Jail, Navy SEALs, Fentanyl & the French Foreign Legion

Taylor Cavanaugh1:21

Should anybody Where did you spend your formidable years? Like where'd you go to like where did you grow up and where'd you go to high school? So San Diego Powe really. So my dad was in the Marines. Okay.

And so we grew up on a Marine. That's what brought us out west. So El Toro, it's all condos now, but it was a Chinook base, you know, the dual propeller helicopters.

So that's what brought us.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:45

Yeah. My dad worked out there and that's what kept us out there.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59

Yes. I forget the exact nomenclature. Those things are big, man.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:04

Dude. The rotor wash from those are no joke.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:35

It's real.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:38

Those pilots are heavy, dude. They have a lot of responsibility. And anything goes wrong, dude. I mean, it's people's lives. It's no joke.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:52

Black hawks

Taylor Cavanaugh2:59

Yeah, dude. Those 160th guys, dude. Those pilots are [ __ ] all stars,

Dude. Allstar pilots, bro.

Taylor Cavanaugh3:27

He worked on Chinuks, but he [ __ ] hated the Marine. He didn't like mechanical [ __ ] And you know, and they asked him to be a flight chief and he's like, "Dude, you want me to go up in these things?" He's like, "I work on these things. I'm not going up."

So he was six in and- out, so it wasn't like a career guy.

Taylor Cavanaugh4:12

Dude those guys get to they fly around because the gas expenditure, the fuel expenditure, they need to burn and they also need to get their hours and so they let them drive them around. We had a guy, he was a Super Hornet pilot. He flew fly from

Taylor Cavanaugh4:52

Cool aircraft.

Taylor Cavanaugh4:54

Yeah, that was one of my specialties in the SEAL teams was I was a JTAC a joint terminal attack controller. So I worked it's coordination between air assets to drop bombs. Yeah. you need a guy on the ground. And so that was actually one of my biggest qualifications. You traveled a lot. And so everywhere I traveled for training was two pilots, two squadrons generally in Hawaii, Idaho, um Utah, a lot of different Air Force bases and Navy bases. So it was I got to hang out with a lot of pilots.

It's a cool community, man. Those guys are no joke.

Taylor Cavanaugh5:40

Yeah. Yeah. Combat CCTS. P the two Air Force special force guys are PJs and CCTS.

Taylor Cavanaugh5:46

Yep. So, they're like a combat craft. I don't know. I forget the what the nomencling zone

And they're like they're pretty much a walking air traffic controller. Like they're the higher level. They're like a JTAC on steroids.

Okay. how I would think.

Taylor Cavanaugh6:03

Very similar. Yeah. So PJ's a medical guy and if you're hurt in a battlefield, that's who you want coming for you.

Taylor Cavanaugh6:15

Yeah, that's what we were doing in Iraq mostly when uh when the ISIS thing was kind of kicking off in about 2015, that time frame. It was target packages, pattern of life, build building, sending 10 gauge grids to things and and then coordinating.

Taylor Cavanaugh6:35

They're not comfortable with it, but I mean, you could drop a bomb 50 m away.

Taylor Cavanaugh6:38

Depend upon what what type of ordinance it is. I mean, danger close means you're within kind of the blast radius. Obviously, you don't want to, you know,

But the closer you get, the d more dangerous it is. And so you got to get a lot more approvals and you got to really be kind of being overrun.

Yeah.

For something like that and you'd probably want to strafe other than drop like a a bomb. But they have 500,000 2,000 lb.

Taylor Cavanaugh7:04

Generally? Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. Usually it's your call. It's usually the guy's call on the ground. It it's it's kind of a conversation, but it's more you're dictating, hey, this is what's happening cuz you're the guy on the ground. It's who it's going to affect. But it's also his [ __ ] career, too. So he's, you know, he's pickling off the bomb and

Taylor Cavanaugh7:25

You feel the reverberation. Boom. I [snorts] mean, it's significant.

Taylor Cavanaugh7:34

Oh, it is.

Taylor Cavanaugh7:46

Dude, high school was Dude, I I I kicked ass in school and sports and stuff, but as kind of goes, you know, I start putting on a little muscle, start getting, you know, attention from the chicks a little bit. And now I'm now I'm out. And my dad was kind of in and out, you know, he had his problems with drugs and alcohol. He'll be the first one to admit it, you know, and u

So I was really raised by a mom who single mom for those years in high school after they divorced kind of the final time.

And so she's a teacher, man. We didn't have a lot of money, but we lived in kind of an affluent area. Yeah. So, man, I was dealing drugs and selling weed and but I was still a academic all-American and captain of the football and lacrosse teams and

And but still doing and working and just cuz I needed money. So, that just I kind of had this hustle kind of mentality

And that [ __ ] catches up to you. I've had a lot of close calls, drinking and driving, a lot of friends dying in high school, going down to Mexico and shooting steroids and going to just thought was normal. But now looking back, all my friends are dead or in prison. So, I know it wasn't normal. And uh but I got kicked out of high school in senior year, lost scholarship opportunities for lacrosse and lost a lot of things, but I was so immature. I didn't really like grasp that.

I was

Taylor Cavanaugh9:01

I had coaches. I had coaches helping me out. I had [ __ ] people, but I wasn't listening, man. I was I was didn't see it clearly. I didn't see

Taylor Cavanaugh9:11

No, man. They say, you know how you say you're, you know, you're hanging around bad people, man. I was the bad person and I I just I I pushed the pace. I just didn't really understand the gravity of of decisions and I felt kind of untouchable which I think a lot of us do at that age and probably continued for me. But I got kicked out of school and so now I'm lost all those opportunities but I still managed to like get into a D3 and and uh playing sports.

And

Taylor Cavanaugh9:37

Chapman University.

Taylor Cavanaugh9:40

Orange County.

Taylor Cavanaugh9:42

Yeah. This one's in Orange.

Oh, okay. And dude, I got kicked out of that school first semester pretty much. I got arrested for weed and fighting and this and kicked out just all the stuff you could possibly imagine. Got kicked off the football team. Right leading into that, I got in a car accident coming back from the river where I was ejected out of a lifted tund on the freeway, dislocated my hip and broke and walked away. I was the least hurt out of everybody. I was

Were you driving? I was sitting shotgun and I I ejected out of the at 3 in the morning on going 90 freeway.

Taylor Cavanaugh10:17

I woke up way down the road in the desert on the like everything. And I look down and I see just all the stuff all over the the was trashed and um and I just lifted my head up and I went and then I felt the pain which

Taylor Cavanaugh10:36

The actual ball joint of my hip popped out and that was significant. And so they had to pop that thing back in man and I blacked out and I walked out of the hospital 2 days later.

Where did they pop it back in? On the road or they get your hospital? They needed a They needed a trauma orthopedic surgeon to do it. And he stood on top of me. He stood on top of me and they wrapped me in this thing and he [ __ ] like fell down on me to get the cuz it's such a big joint. Yes.

And I went out, man. I was 18. I was 17.

Taylor Cavanaugh11:06

Well, they did. I was yelling at him to give me more morphine on. I'm like, you got They had to keep calling in. They're like, "We can't give you anymore, man." And I just demanding it.

Taylor Cavanaugh11:20

Yeah, dude. That wasn't popping at the time, but it was um yeah, it was significant. But that didn't set me up well going into college. And I came back and then it's that was working masonry jobs, going to junior college, like really having the oh, I was a BOC kind of thing. And now I'm like living at my [ __ ] mom's house trying to make it work and dealing more drugs and doing all these things, not going to school now, and still trying. And I failed two more junior colleges and then I woke up and I had a moment of clarity.

It was mid-occtober 2004 just to kind of give and it was raining man. And I remember something this homeless guy said to me. He goes you know what rain means man means change. And I remember that for whatever reason this homeless guy said that to me and I said dude I got to change something. And I felt like the world closing in. Called my dad who you know we had kind of an off and on relationship but I knew he had a level head about this type of [ __ ] And I said dude I got to get out of here.

So they put me in like a psych ward lockdown for 5 days because it was my family, but it was really just for insurance. It was like kind of a detox thing, but

Taylor Cavanaugh12:25

But they just needed to separate me from where I was at. And I gave him all the drugs I had, all the money, and I got and [ __ ] keys to my truck and apartment. I said, "I'm getting out of here."

That's when he was there and I had I said, "Dad, dude, I need to get out of here." And he goes, "You should go back to Gloucester and get out of here." And thank God I did because a bunch of dudes I was hanging around weeks later get arrested for uh felony uh having stolen goods and all a bunch of [ __ ] But a lot of stuff kind of came collapsing in right after I left. And so that's when I kind of got my [ __ ] together for a couple years and then transferred back to California where I went to University of California, Santa Cruz.

Taylor Cavanaugh13:03

That's where I graduated from.

Taylor Cavanaugh13:05

I did. It took me about five universities, but it took me about five universities, but I patched it together. And when I was in Santa Cruz, man, I

Made it happen with the politics kind of a pre-law degree. But I I [ __ ] got arrested a ton. Uh probably 17 times in two years, man, for drunk in Publix, fighting all just knucklehead [ __ ] DUI, driving on a suspended, a lot of different like just not pushing grandmas in the street, which is why I could kind of lie to myself. I'm like, it's kind of normal.

But when I I knew I was gonna I wanted to be a Navy SEAL from 7 years old. I remember the moment and I and so when I went into the recruiter, I was scared to be a SEAL cuz I thought I was going to [ __ ] fail cuz I hated running, which I'm going to talk to you about in a minute here.

So I went to the Marines, they turned me down for for tattoos and also

Did you have all these tattoos at that time? No, just my back and some other things, but

Taylor Cavanaugh14:03

Nothing you could see. Just it was all kind of above, but it was just too much of a percentage of my body.

Taylor Cavanaugh14:08

But also I had to go to jail. So I had to go to jail to go get off probation and so they sent me four months in u the judge gave me 6 months in in S in like uh San Bay Area County Jail. So I did four. So they gave me four.

So you did four months in a county jail. 23 dude on misdemeanor just

Taylor Cavanaugh14:33

Bro it was packed so it was all dudes waiting to go to prison and like tons of different deep and so

Taylor Cavanaugh14:45

Served a sentence

Taylor Cavanaugh14:48

Not prison it was kind of a unique situation because usually you'll serve time but they'll give you up to a year of serve time in a county.

Taylor Cavanaugh14:57

So, I was because I was kind of in that weird tweener spot, they put me in county. It was a it was a lockdown facility. I didn't see the sun for three [ __ ] months.

Taylor Cavanaugh15:30

Yeah, dude. There was some sk there was some sketchy ass moments for sure and there were some guys I played chess with one of like hardcore Nortano dude who like never talked. He was in there on passport fraud and some other stuff. So I had I had

Some good people kind of around me that it's I didn't have any issues. Couple little tuffles, you know, but nothing crazy. And I

Taylor Cavanaugh15:56

Well, white can stay with white, but usually it's uh

White and Mexican's kind of an interesting white and brown's kind of an interesting kind of a mix. It wasn't crazy segregated in that particular

Taylor Cavanaugh16:11

Yeah. And that's that would have been a issue. It wasn't enough time and it was just misdemeanors and so it wasn't like a crazy situation which I I still feel like God and certain things kind of direct you because I was still rolling the dice. There was no guarantees I was going to get in the military even with this. Yeah.

So I just wanted to but I had no option. It was either that or wait multiple years to actually have an opportunity and it worked out okay for me.

Taylor Cavanaugh16:40

Yep. The commuting. So I I got a judge and a lawyer to they say, "Hey, if you want to commute your sentence," which I actually did multiple times in my life. Yeah. If you serve time, so you don't have to wait for your probationary sentence if you just go serve time.

Taylor Cavanaugh16:56

Yeah. It's called commuting your sentence. So I Sometimes they'll just do it if you're going to go in the military, but this judge was, you know, not doing that.

Taylor Cavanaugh19:09

They'll stab you in a heartbeat.

Yeah. There were some things I just had to be smart, but I wasn't overly quiet. I was always kind of in shape kid. I'm 23. I just did a lot of push-ups, burpees, and I I had my little program. I volunteered to do jail laundry, which kept me out of the pod for like

Eight hours a day, seven days a week. So, I had a good rhythm, and I had a good cell guy that was in there serving a year on just a violation. So it was it ended up being okay and I just read a lot and did a lot of [ __ ] and and got out and then I went to the recruiter man and was like all right let's rock and rolling.

Taylor Cavanaugh19:44

I went to a Marine officer recruiter ironically just

Taylor Cavanaugh19:47

Cuz I had a degree and my and my grandfather was a captain in the Navy. He was Nixon's adviser in the Pentagon. He was so he was up for admiral. Like he had done a lot of things and my that's where my mother was come from. So when she heard you're going to the military she's like you can't go enlisted. You know it was like that. And and so I tried and they were like, "Dude, get out of here, bro. You know, you got this.

You're not what we're looking for." And they actually completely denied me from the Marine Corps forever.

Taylor Cavanaugh20:14

Yeah. And they said because they for whatever. And then the Army denied me for criminal background. So that's when the depression hit really bad where this is where the French Foreign Legion started to come on my radar.

Yeah. And I went, "Okay, well, this is a unit that takes guys with checkered backgrounds, but I still had student loans and other things that I was like, dude, I can't just leave right now." So, I said, "I'll give the Navy recruiter one last shot." I rode my bike down there, man, cuz I didn't have a car. And he said, "We can work with this, man, but you can like wrangle [ __ ] or be a Navy SEAL. You you your job selection is really minimal because of what the things you've been charged for,

Taylor Cavanaugh20:51

And I said, "Well, that's why I'm here. What do I got to do?" And so he said, "Dude, you got to pass all these physical screening tests." And mind you, I was like 230. Two.

Taylor Cavanaugh20:59

230. Dude, I hadn't run a mile in [ __ ] years. Yeah. Right. Unless I was running from the cops, bro. I had run a mile in a long time.

So I said, "All right, I'm going to start this." And I lost

Probably 40 lbs in 6 weeks. Yeah.

Just running. I found an old lieutenant commander that was like a a naval special warfare recruiter, like motivator they called it at the time. And I called them up, man. I called him. I said, "Hey, here's me. What do I got to do? Where do I show up?

Taylor Cavanaugh21:25

This is in San Diego. And he ran Vegas, Los Angeles. Commander Fuller. What's up, man? And uh and then a senior chief, Hans Garcia. He was a active duty guy at the time who him and I actually connected again recently.

Taylor Cavanaugh21:38

No, they're there. One's active duty. It was just part of their job, man. And they were contracted and guys who wanted

Taylor Cavanaugh21:44

Yeah. Who were still civilians? So I was stacking boxes at Home Depot at night,

Driving down to the Naval Amphibious Base. Dude, I had homefield advantage. I had the SE the SEAL training facility down the street. Yeah. And so I went, you know, if I had the opportunity, I was in the pool where I would have been going to BUD/S where I went, you know, a year later.

Taylor Cavanaugh22:04

I was always I was a competitive swimmer.

Oh, so I was a competitive swimmer. I was one of the fastest 13-year-olds in San Diego, man. Like I swam competitively. Thank god my mom put me in [ __ ] swimming cuz I was

Taylor Cavanaugh22:22

I did 2-hour practices swimming consistently when I was like 10, 11, 12.

Taylor Cavanaugh22:27

if I don't pool and the ocean and the swimming and seal training was easy for me. That was like I actually was like a break.

Taylor Cavanaugh22:39

Yeah, that was a break for me. And so that was huge because I had this huge swath of of selection which was I had no stress about the ocean swims and stuff. I was really good at guiding. I would actually help other guys, some of my partners guide and they would help me on the runs. So, it was kind of a good exchange.

Taylor Cavanaugh22:59

No, man. I suffer, bro.

Taylor Cavanaugh23:11

It's the volume. It's like the It's the volume and the uncertainty of how long things will last that gets guys. Yeah.

So they'll, you know, you'll wake up in the morning and you're so beat up, man. And then they'll be like, "Go in the water." And it's pitch black, dude.

Taylor Cavanaugh23:28

Dude, they would do this stuff. The instructor, especially on the San Island, kind of in the last parts of BUD/S where they we've lost a bet. So you bet the instructor sometimes on stuff and we lost a bet and he goes, "Hey, we're going to do what we're going to call hysterical wetness for three days where we were not allowed to be dry for three straight days." And so you wake up perfectly dry first thing before you eat and you jump in the ocean, man. And it's like it's not just water or pool water.

It's sand and you're chafing and now you're running and it doesn't mean you stop doing everything else. So you're doing obstacle courses freezing in December and that part is just really what

Taylor Cavanaugh24:06

Oh yeah, dude. We would have we had some Singaporean commando dudes who were so skinny. dudes would seizure, dude fall down seizuring because uh so cold.

Taylor Cavanaugh24:17

You get medically dropped because it's just you can't do it. So what they actually started doing was they made these doc do at the time they were doing this, I don't know if they're still doing it, make us swallow these build big pills that actually test your core temperature. And so then after we'd get out of surf torture, they'd come and a doctor would wand us and it would tell the core temperature. So if dude fell and was like seizuring and he was faking, right, they'd know.

And so they would be able to tell what your core temperature was.

Yeah. And when they were like pushing the line of when people would start dying because people die in SEAL training often.

Taylor Cavanaugh24:50

So cold was that's what gets guys cold and injuries and failure.

Taylor Cavanaugh24:58

Oh my god, dude. Brother, I I am the line to be a Navy SEAL. Anybody behind me is not a Navy SEAL. Anybody in front of me pass. I always pass though. I would always pass. So, what would be the times?

So, the times in the beginning, and mind you, you're running in sand.

Taylor Cavanaugh25:16

In boots and pants.

Taylor Cavanaugh25:20

So, it starts at 32 minutes for a four mile,

Taylor Cavanaugh25:25

That's pretty [ __ ] fast in speed up. And so, by the end, you're at 28 minutes. So, you're at 28 minutes.

7 miles. It's like about in the third phase you're about and some and on that you're running hard pack generally cuz you're running around a airfield. So the time kind of improves

By the end I'm running about 2745 you know four mile and that's

Taylor Cavanaugh25:46

So I'm just under seven and I'm like moving and I'm in pretty good shape probably 185

Taylor Cavanaugh25:51

But you know you're running 10 that's like just the test you know all the all but you're running six miles a day just to eat. Some of that's timed because it's a mile there, mile back. Yeah.

And then you're running everywhere. So you're not stopping. And then hell week's 250 miles or something in 5 days or 6 days, I think. All added up. And that's with a boat on your head. So you're not run you're running with a a smash.

Taylor Cavanaugh26:17

Yeah. That's about uh what they've added it up to. It's about 2 to 250. It

Taylor Cavanaugh26:30

But you're not stopping for 24 hours. You You have You have 2 hours in 5 days where you lay down.

Taylor Cavanaugh26:42

No, no. It's they have to keep you moving.

Taylor Cavanaugh26:49

So, day three and hell week they'll Dude, it's like a big blur, but

Taylor Cavanaugh26:55

So you haven't slept. So you you you you start your normal day, you'll do like some boats. You're running with a boat on your head and then you might do some some rows in and out. You're running to eat and then you're running running to all on the beach. Then

Taylor Cavanaugh27:09

Yeah.

Oh, 100%. Fall asleep because you can't sit down cuz everyone falling asleep when they're eating. So you'll just dudes will be dropping their plates and [ __ ] hallucinating. You're hallucinating by about Wednesday. Pretty hardcore. And then so you're I'm seeing Buddhas in the sky and a lot of dudes see chain link fences. So you're doing a lot of rowing, a lot of running, a lot of lunging, a lot of obstacle courses and Yeah. And then they'll let you sleep for an hour and a half and then you're back up.

Taylor Cavanaugh27:34

It's Dude, you I had such bad c dick chafe from the from the like and I felt okay when I was like kind of wet, but then when I slept, my body had a chance to like heal a little bit. And I woke up and it was actually my birthday, man. And I turned 25. It was my birthday and my mom had given one of my good buddies who's still operating at the tip of the spear today. Savage mood, a birthday card. And I woke up from this first sleep where we sleep in the sand pretty much.

And I wake up and he goes, "Hey, this is from your mom." And I go, "What?" And he hands me this like he had stuffed the birthday card like in the sand and it was all disintegrated and it said like, "Love you, honey." And I was like, and I remember thinking like I was I'm like, "Am I hallucinating like what is happening?" But so you're running, you're doing a lot of little [ __ ] [ __ ] games and run around and competitions and and sprints and but they have to keep you moving because you'll just fall asleep.

Taylor Cavanaugh28:32

We were at Dude, I don't even know what the number we were at. We were at least 50% probably failed.

Taylor Cavanaugh28:37

Yeah. And they just disappear. You just never see them again. You just want people disappear in the night, you know, and they just you have medical checks a couple times where they're checking your, you know, rot and chafing. And some guys at the end of hell week who made it had to go to the hospital and get skin grafts on their legs and No way.

Yeah. Such such bad chafe, man. And and so uh and then they do a medical they check you cuz we had such bad skeletal muscle breakdown like dude's heads are swollen, their joints are all swollen just from the the body not being able to process it through the kidneys and liver. And so then then they'll let you go on Saturday morning and dude that breakfast slapped. Let me tell you, dude, it felt so good, man. But yeah, it's it's a significant event.

Taylor Cavanaugh29:23

Dude. And so for me, dude, I felt like I had no option but to pass. I I didn't even think about quitting cuz I didn't I for me, I had no plan B, dude. I could not been on

Taylor Cavanaugh29:36

Every run, dude. The conditioning runs were so fast. And we had a dude, Eddie Gallagher, who been in the news and stuff. He was one of my instructors. had a great podcast with down at his house. Eddie, what's up, brother?

He they call him Fast Eddie. Dude is a cardio monster. And he would lead these runs, dude. And dude, there was no [ __ ] way I was keeping this pace. And so you have some of the bigger guys in the back, some of the good runners in the front.

And usually the class is kind of, you know, you But I was in the Goon Squad, so I'm I'm wet and sandy doing all these runs. But then at the end, what they do is they make you do sprints, and I'm I'm [ __ ] fast for 40 yards. And so and so I would get off the beach. So and then they do sprints and so it they kind of just see, hey man, like are you going to keep going, you know? And so I had every run, dude, I went through a really dark place cuz I was also worried about failing.

Definitely on the on the conditioning runs. I had to really put out. Yeah.

I had to be paying attention to turnover rate and like not bogging down in the soft sand and really leaning forward. Like my technique had to be really good.

Taylor Cavanaugh32:00

Dude I watched I was reading some of your times I saw was like a 228 on something bro that's fast man

Taylor Cavanaugh33:01

Yeah, it's keeping it framed right that's so important.

Taylor Cavanaugh33:13

You had to carry.

Taylor Cavanaugh33:30

Throw out.

Taylor Cavanaugh33:49

You know? So it was like Like I'm not here to play [ __ ] jingga,

Taylor Cavanaugh34:07

That sucks. You can't they don't let you just keep going.

Taylor Cavanaugh34:32

Y

Taylor Cavanaugh34:35

Mongolia is heavy, dude.

Taylor Cavanaugh34:40

Mongolia is an interesting country, dude. We had a lot of Mongolians in the French foreign legion.

Taylor Cavanaugh34:45

Lot. Yeah. Tough. I'd say a lot. Maybe

4% 3%. Yeah. So, it's not like a small number, but yeah. I mean, Mongolians I I had a lot of good experiences with.

Taylor Cavanaugh34:57

Yeah. Interesting language, too.

Taylor Cavanaugh36:35

So, I go to Seal Team 7. We go to language. I had a Dude, I had

Taylor Cavanaugh36:40

West Coast. So all the odd numbers on the West Coast, all the even numbers on the East Coast.

Taylor Cavanaugh36:44

And dude, I felt [ __ ] amazing making it there, making it through SQT. I I was one of the only originals. 13 out of [ __ ] 250 people that showed up for that class. 13 guys made it all the way through.

Taylor Cavanaugh36:57

More guys ended up becoming SEALs, but they get rolled back. But I but 13 made it [ __ ] all the way through front to back. And

Taylor Cavanaugh37:13

Dude, those dudes are savages, man. Dude, the guys that go to development group and go to that screener is it's heavy. Green team and all that. It's really [ __ ] hard.

Taylor Cavanaugh37:22

Yeah.

So, usually you got to be about the top 10% of your team.

Taylor Cavanaugh37:33

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh37:35

Yeah. and they'll [ __ ] usually kick him out. Usually they'll get they'll they'll remove their trident if they're rated that low for

Taylor Cavanaugh37:45

Pretty much. Yeah. And that's all the way through training. You do what's called pure evals where the guy lowest even all the way from first phase up. Every guy ranks the guys front to last in the class. And if you're bottom five, dude, they'll [ __ ] kick you out.

Taylor Cavanaugh37:59

Yeah. So you better

Taylor Cavanaugh38:02

Top five to top n top 10 almost all the way through. And then when I got to team seven, I was the best junior so sailor. Yeah. And so I was number one at my rank. And I had

I had kind of a golden boy kind of a ride, man. I had a really good chief. Got a really good situation. I volunteered to go to comms, which is a kind of a shitty not sexy school

Cuz it was [ __ ] available. I was like, dude,

Why is it considered shitty? I would think all radio and you're carrying a radio. They're heavy as [ __ ] You're with the command and control element. you're carrying batteries and it's just not sexy. And nobody It's thankless because nobody says thank you when the comms are working, but when they're not working, you're the ship. And so you're also doing carrying laptops, sending pictures with satellites, and doing crypto. There's like it's a threemon gnarly course.

Taylor Cavanaugh38:56

Yeah. And so you're carrying satellites and [ __ ] batteries and

Taylor Cavanaugh39:08

It doesn't work like that. Maybe they'll carry an extra battery for themselves, but they're carry You got to remember as a SEAL unit, you got guys that are carrying weapon systems and ammo that are insane for a conventional.

Taylor Cavanaugh39:19

Everyone has like everyone's paying the man in their own capacity cuz you got guys carrying beltfed weapons that are 25 pounds just the gun."

Taylor Cavanaugh39:37

But it was just a school that they said, "Hey, you can take vacation or you can go to comm school." I said, "Dude, I want to be I want to be a SEAL. It's my whole dream. I I didn't want to be anywhere else." And so, I volunteered and that set me up for I come back and they say, "Hey, we want to go to J-tax school, but all the guys are just coming back from Afghanistan who are older because it's usually an older guy course.

Can you go?" And I said, "I'll [ __ ] be there January 1st." So, I went. It's up in Fallon, Nevada with the Top Gun School. So, I went did backseat rides and did all the [ __ ] And

Taylor Cavanaugh40:08

So, not always, but because I was a comms guy, they [ __ ] loved it because I had a really good handle on comms and I I knew how to program everything.

Taylor Cavanaugh40:19

Oh, dude, it was one of the

Taylor Cavanaugh40:23

It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life, dude. Seriously. So hard on the body. You got to work to stay conscious. You got a G. We're doing a They were doing a dog fight with a F-16

Taylor Cavanaugh40:34

Me in the back. And so I'm going

So you don't even know what's coming going, dude. I'm going to put this Navy SEAL through the ringer. And I was determined not to puke and not to pass out, which I didn't. But I mean, it was I mean work for two hours. So I was had a whole new respect for pilots just off of what they do cuz they're writing and doing all this [ __ ] while they're doing all that.

Freaking really smart guys. super smart, unbelievably high high level, good community, the the SEAL special operations community, special operations community in general and pilots at that tip of the spear. Very similar, very similar groups of dudes. They just want to get after it. So I did that and then I came back, man, and they say, "Hey, we want a JTAC comm's sniper. Can you go to sniper school?" So I [ __ ] and I shot well and and I passed, man. And I beat a lot of the older guys, which dude, I had to fight older guys for it.

I had to fight them because they were [ __ ] pissed that a new guy was going to sniper school. It's usually

Taylor Cavanaugh41:31

Yeah, they're like, put the gloves on and get in the [ __ ] Yeah. Oh, yeah. 100%.

Taylor Cavanaugh41:37

Oh, yeah. They got a fight gym in the at the West Coast Seal Type. They probably have it at both coast, but it's So, they have a whole training gym.

Taylor Cavanaugh41:46

Yeah, I did. I trained Muay Thai pretty heavily

Taylor Cavanaugh41:51

I mean, these guys it was it was I got my ass kicked a couple times, but you know, it was it was what it was. That's pretty normal in the SEAL teams. They call it going over the burm. Like just square [ __ ] away. And uh

Taylor Cavanaugh42:06

Yeah. They're like, "No." They're like, "I don't think a [ __ ] new guy should have the sniper school to chief." And he's like, "Well, you guys [ __ ] handle it then. That's how it would go." And so so I still went and so I still went to sniper school.

Taylor Cavanaugh42:20

You still go if the chief wants you to go, but at least he he got his word said.

Taylor Cavanaugh42:30

Yeah. Or if he said Yeah. Yeah. The chief will be like, "You guys figure it out." Which is exactly what happened.

Taylor Cavanaugh42:35

Yeah. I'm like, "Fine." I mean, you can't say no. You know, you're getting called out. So it's man [ __ ] at that point. And it's a bunch of meat eaters. So I went to sniper school in Adabbury, Indiana. Unbelievable. Best hard as [ __ ] Really stressful.

Taylor Cavanaugh42:53

Sniper. I went to the last test which you have you can fail like three tests on one gun and then you but you got to pass and I went to the final test on my on the 300 win mag.

I would say the hardest stocking very easy for me. I was pretty high rated in the class for stocking

Taylor Cavanaugh43:34

The instructors can see everybody, right? They're in the field, but then they'll walk try to walk you on, especially after you set up your tripod and shoot.

I love stocking. I really I like anything in the SEAL teams which I also did Advent laden which was low visibility operations beards and and stuff but that's a lot of alone stuff. I love stuff where you're solving problems by yourself.

Taylor Cavanaugh43:56

I really I I thrive in those situations. But I

Went to the final test on the actual shooting test on one of the guns and it was hard man. It was very very challenging but I passed and became a sniper and then we went to

Taylor Cavanaugh44:29

So you'll usually be in a pair. You'll usually be in pairs and dude, you sit there for hours and hours and hours, but you start to have what's called like scope fatigue, you know, and you'll and you'll you can only look through glass so long before it starts getting a little weird.

Taylor Cavanaugh44:42

It's usually a reconnaissance mission, you know, you're usually getting intel. Okay.

Versus shooting somebody, you know, and

But and then you'll switch out with your partner, you know, and so that's usually how it'll go. And so whatever rotation it works for guys.

Taylor Cavanaugh44:57

You're never going to be alone.

Taylor Cavanaugh45:02

Yeah. No joke.

Yeah. I I I did really well with that stuff with that like laser focus piece and I was in the job I wanted to do, you know? So, it's you could sit and [ __ ] do anything if you really want.

Taylor Cavanaugh45:13

Yeah, low visit. So, Advent laden,

Taylor Cavanaugh45:16

So, there's low visibility operation called advanced special operation ASOT, which is vetting spies and and [ __ ] gathering intel and you're in civilian clothes and and that was part of another qualification I had. I went to a school which was put on by the army and you're sending reports to CIA entities and and doing site surveys and in-n-outs and and uh get how to hide USB drives and [ __ ] bark and all that [ __ ] man. How to get a shake to draw a map who doesn't [ __ ] look at maps and Yeah.

See, so I was working with the Shake in Iraq and we'd, you know, do things and drive around with you and maybe one other guy with a [ __ ] gun and and civilian clothes

Taylor Cavanaugh46:02

In hotel rooms and switching cars and doing all that type of [ __ ]

Taylor Cavanaugh46:06

Awesome. I love that [ __ ] The reports are tough though because

You're writing reports a lot and there's a very formal way you write reports that are

Very time inensive and [ __ ] lame. So, you know, so you're spending a lot of hours doing that [ __ ] But there's upper levels too, like even in the SEAL teams, you'll go to a level three, which you can circumvent going to the farm, you know, in FBI or CIA because you've already done this course.

There's there's a feeder, you know, which which the intel

Human intelligence and it all feeds into this one main source. But it's interesting, man. Very very interesting.

Taylor Cavanaugh46:55

So we go to Yemen was a low visibility operation. Not hot though. So we're training counter inter was a foreign internal defense mission which they only let eight seals in the country. Eight seals in one area and three or four in the in another.

It's got to be [ __ ] dangerous because you get like some uh rat in there to turn you guys in and tell like ISIS like dude there's eight seals here and they're all sleeping. This was AQAP, al-Qaeda Arabian Peninsula we're after there. That base we were at actually getting overrun by the Houthis at some point. But we take over an old Russian airfield. And so I'm a guy flew in from Afghanistan, a CCT air force guy, and made me an air traffic controller. Was like, "Hey, here's a day course of [ __ ] bringing in aircraft.

We're chasing camels off the [ __ ] airfield and driving around." That was a cool mission. 7 months out there, so long time out on a small base with nothing. and uh living in tents, not com not combat [ __ ] though, right? But training and living with

Taylor Cavanaugh47:57

Oh, you're I mean you're standing watching a sniper tower. We're on 24-hour security watch on 100 100 by meter base by ourselves

Taylor Cavanaugh48:06

Eight [ __ ] guys

Taylor Cavanaugh48:08

Seven months. And we're

Taylor Cavanaugh48:11

That's why I get in fights and [ __ ] Absolutely.

Taylor Cavanaugh48:19

You get, you know, you little tiffs and you're making food for yourself. I mean, there's no

Base. There's no And no, no deployment I ever been on was there a base or a galley or we made our own food and we're buying from the local [ __ ]

Schwarma guy.

Would you would you get one guy in the team that would be like a really into [ __ ] into cooking and [ __ ] and be like are going to cook a feast for us? Sometimes you you'd get some guys that were down to do it every once in a while, but you're you're on 24-hour rotations and watches and so you're all like sleeping at different times.

Taylor Cavanaugh48:50

Camera once a while. We do that like the officer would make everybody like sit down so we'd have like some cohesive thing. We do that every once in a while. And then in Iraq, uh 18 months later, couple years later, that's when ISIS was there. And so we pushed out and we're on the forward line of troops and that's where we kind of mixed it up a little bit.

Yeah. So when you got into your first like firefight, what happened? Dude, we got out to the Ford line of troops and mind you, it's not kicking indoors, right? It's a different type of It's not like Fallujah, right? So, it's a totally different kind of environment, but you're taking mortars. We're taking rockets at our base. We're taking when you're putting up walls, mind you. There's no [ __ ] walls. We moved out there and there was nothing. Zero base. We had a couple cars and we're like putting up Hesco walls by hand.

So, dude, nothing.

You guys had a campsite. We had a campsite and you're taking rockets, you know, and so and the forward line of troops of ISIS.

Taylor Cavanaugh49:42

They landed 50 meters this way. It like one time they landed just above past us and hit a [ __ ] school. Bunch of kids.

Taylor Cavanaugh49:53

All SEALs at first and then as we started to build it which was the mission which was to kind of build out this platform to bring in

Taylor Cavanaugh50:01

Yeah, we so we deployed with two CBS.

Okay. So we had a [ __ ] plumber and electrician cuz we don't know how to do that [ __ ] And so you have guys that know how to do some real [ __ ] Weld and like you have to have those guys there and they're solid some of the best solid human being.

Taylor Cavanaugh50:22

A little bit. You have some that are down to get it though. Right. You have some guys that are just tough.

Taylor Cavanaugh50:27

Right. One guy I deployed with multiple times even in Yemen and he was a [ __ ] beast dude. He'll slay guys just just as much as a seal.

Taylor Cavanaugh50:38

Mostly not. Not not the guys that in NSW that I had ever saw. I never saw a guy get weird. We would have CIA people come and [ __ ] people from God knows where, some department, Department of States, some [ __ ] And they, you know, he'd have a some woman or some guy out there in his 5'11 pants and no way.

Taylor Cavanaugh51:01

Yeah. They're like, "Oh, this is not playtime out here. We're out here growing a beard and getting weird." You know, you know, I haven't seen a I like that though. You're away from the flagpole. But we built out this base. Then we turned it over to the Marine Corps and then dudes would leaprog and kind of build it out. And our job was to meet with the Sunni tribal fighters. We had three Sunni tribal fighters that ended displaced by ISIS. and group them up, get them into some kind of a fighting force, figure out who they had, and then start leaprogging and taking back over these small little villages that have been taken over by ISIS.

Taylor Cavanaugh51:42

"Yeah, mostly not. I mean, it's always a thought. Some [ __ ] can be weird and it has happened. We were with Kurdish Peshmerga kind of near us. The Kurds are great and the Kurdish Peshmerga love us.

Taylor Cavanaugh52:00

The Kurds are great, dude. They love Americans. They take pride in keeping Americans safe in their area. And then the Sunni the you know the Sunni Sun Sunnis a little different. There's you never know who you're dealing with. But the Shakes and stuff, they they rule with an iron fist. They're not going to have some guy ruin it for them. They want bombs. They want guns. They want

Taylor Cavanaugh52:20

Yeah. They want those dudes out. So the Shiite are supported by Iran and the proxy group Russia and China, right? So you have the Shiites that are supported by US and then the Sunnis were supported by that's kind of how it went.

And so out there for 6 months, but mind you, while I'm out there,

Dude, I had gotten in trouble before this deployment and I got an aggravated assault charge and I went in the I have a top secret clearance and all this [ __ ] So I have a

Taylor Cavanaugh52:51

Fighting uh uh uh 6 years plus three plea deal. 6 years in prison plus three-year plea deal.

Taylor Cavanaugh53:00

That was the deal they offered me. It went right in the face, right?

This was right before I left. So I'm in this [ __ ] Iraq facing a jury trial when I get back. Probably going to lose my trident my entire life. That was what I was doing.

Taylor Cavanaugh53:13

I volunteered to stay out there three more months.

I did, dude. I And I thought about going awall joining Curse Per. I thought about all the [ __ ] man.

Taylor Cavanaugh53:24

I mean, they didn't really Nobody really knew the significance of what I was going through. They knew I had been in trouble, but I wasn't like telegraphing this [ __ ]

Taylor Cavanaugh53:34

Yeah. And

Taylor Cavanaugh53:36

Yep. And that punch and I tell everybody, man, dude, it only takes one small [ __ ] lapse in judgment. And I was I was in the wrong, you know, I look back, I was I'm no [ __ ] victim.

Taylor Cavanaugh53:51

And it happens. It's happened to a lot of guys, dude. And there's a lot of guys sitting in jail right now. All it takes, you don't realize, man, how how [ __ ] every I had the world by the balls, man. I was the earliest promote, all these things, and I was And you in your story, I I know there's a lot of overlap because it's like you're peaking, but there's you're still making it happen even with all the cracks in the foundation and things going on.

And so it's like there's nothing really corrective about it cuz you're like, "Well, I'm it's still working. What I'm doing is working." So, and it's like when that momentum and you get ahead of your skis and [ __ ] yard sale, man. And that's that's when it comes at some point. I say, "You can't bend reality that long." And that's what happened

Taylor Cavanaugh55:07

I was just drinking and partying and [ __ ] but it's the same [ __ ] I was just I was just having these not being my best self. And when you're not your best self for a long enough period of time, you're going to get [ __ ] corrected. That's right. Universal.

Taylor Cavanaugh55:23

Dude, I I walk the plank and I'm [ __ ] go to I'm up in Idaho and where I had had a good attorney and paid a lot of money.

Taylor Cavanaugh55:33

In Boise.

Taylor Cavanaugh55:42

Well, that No, it was kind of that, but I was in Idaho, right?

Taylor Cavanaugh55:46

They knew I was a some military guy and I was on a date with a chick and come to find out like he didn't really like that I was there with her and I didn't know this whole backstory. Okay.

I just knew there was some tension.

Taylor Cavanaugh55:58

Yeah, I was just out of town. I was on a date with a chick at a steakhouse. It wasn't like a bar, you know. And the guy was like, "We know that girl and she's with some guys,"

You know, and there was something along those lines and I just I was reading the room, but I didn't care and I didn't leave and I could have removed myself before and I didn't and I was too drunk, you know, you know, and I was drunk and so there was I had no I had lack of emotional control also on top of it. So that's why I have no I have no ground to stand on. I was completely [ __ ] in the wrong and I could have controlled myself and I didn't.

Taylor Cavanaugh56:32

Run away. Run away. It's like walk away. And and I've learned I learned that the hard way. So what happened when you went to like to deal with I finally get a I'm like in my dress blues. I'd been out all night. I pretty much just was burning in like I was thinking I was walking the plank and at the steps of the courthouse I get a deal and they say, "Hey, we're going to max out misdemeanors. You don't want to get a felony." Because a felony would have been a game changer for me.

So I was

Taylor Cavanaugh56:58

I would gone to prison. I was going to prison and I would have got a felony and it would have been kicked out. It would have been the whole game changer. Jesus.

So I So I was willing to take it to trial because of that.

Yeah. So I get a misdemeanor. I have to pay my whole Iraq check to this guy for restitution like to get they I had to pay everything upfront or they were going to keep it a felony. That was the whole rule instead.

Taylor Cavanaugh57:19

I had the money cuz I was

Taylor Cavanaugh57:22

50 grand or 60.

Holy [ __ ] I had paid a lot more than that cuz I was still getting sued by him for4 million dollars civily. So I have all this stuff going on and

Taylor Cavanaugh57:35

Exactly. And that's how I viewed it.

Taylor Cavanaugh57:37

Yeah. That's that's how I looked at it. So

Taylor Cavanaugh57:49

Yeah. And so I paid the man on that and paid all my restitution and then I went to jail. So I

Taylor Cavanaugh57:55

I took vacation and went to jail for [ __ ] three weeks.

Taylor Cavanaugh57:58

Yeah. So I went to jail in county up there in a lockdown facility. So all pop, you know, 80 dudes, all felonies waiting to go to. So it was county again doing this and I'm in there working out, doing my thing. I went maybe was two weeks and some change and I did that and I got out and I went [ __ ] right back that day. They take me back and I go right back in the train and I'm training and I'm getting in the next workout.

I get demoted and I'm back to land warfare that [ __ ] day in the train.

Taylor Cavanaugh58:27

In in one of the training cells.

Taylor Cavanaugh58:29

So, I just go right back to land warfare and I'm right back in it.

Taylor Cavanaugh58:34

Yep. So, I got demoted which was what it is was what it was. And now I'm back in it. And so, now I'm in this really good swing and I can't drink, can't do drugs, I can't travel, I can't own a weapon apparently and all these like things and and I'm a SEAL. So, there was this weird gap and I have a formal probation person.

Taylor Cavanaugh58:53

I go check in with them and they were good with me, man. But I was I hadn't fixed this.

Taylor Cavanaugh58:59

I I had

Taylor Cavanaugh59:01

I had cleaned up the stuff, but I hadn't really fixed and I was like swore I was going to do good, right? I was going to [ __ ] live and not keep myself out of trouble,

But I hadn't changed my identity with it yet.

And so then the the girls start calling again and I mean I'm at weddings and people are like, "Hey, man, want to drink one of this?" I'm like, "No, dude. No, no, no." like and I was so I was trying but I had no structure to

Taylor Cavanaugh59:24

Oh dude it's a very big drinking culture and so I'm like it's a warrior culture. It's how it is like a Vikings man and so I'm like dude and I'm trying to do good but then the girls start calling and this and then I'm kind of back traveling and you know and I'm and I'm now I'm just doing what I was doing. Okay.

And so I I'm just but I'm being smart. I'm not like getting fights. I'm really like and I'd never been in in a situation like that ever again since that a fight I should say but I ended up getting in a different altercation

And so I'm going and I'm like all right things are good and I'm back getting getting good evals like all this shit's kind of picking back up and I'm good for months and I meet this girl and I'm in love and things are all going amaz and I remember having this thought and I'm in the shower and I dude I was like dude I'm the happiest I've ever been. I was in the best shape I had ever been in my life. Yeah. I was just the I was elated back and I go on a date and I get in an altercation and I'm [ __ ] tased and dog sicked on me at a Jimmy Buffett concert.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:00:24

So I, you know, we're out, we're drinking, we're doing this stuff and then I get in a a golf cart that's a county golf cart and this is how I lost my seal career. Get in a county golf cart and I'm tooling around the the parking lot and whose golf cart was

A [ __ ] county like Delmark.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:00:42

Yeah. Yeah. So we're we're driving in the parking lot and there's people all in this [ __ ] And it's all like

Kind of chaos, but it was

And then a cop pulls pulls me over in this [ __ ] golf cart. I got no shirt on and I'm on probation and I'm drunk and I'm and I go and I had that moment of clarity going, "What the [ __ ] am I doing, dude? This is I'm This is going to go bad."

Taylor Cavanaugh1:01:00

So I try I was like, "Yeah, I'm going to get my ID and I try running and they sick. They tackle me. I get up. They stick a dog on me, tase me. It's like it turns into this whole [ __ ] thing. Hundreds of people are watching this. Hundreds of people are watching this and you know I'm bleeding. I'm all dirty. I'm in this dirt parking lot and they throw me in the back of the car and I told him I call Seal Team 7 man because I'm [ __ ] you know and and I knew it.

And so I end up that charge gets dropped and so I didn't really get charged for anything and and I'm I'm having another good attorney and I have I talked to the San Diego Chief of Police who I knew and so I'm having I'm working some angles and I'm getting this [ __ ] cleared up even though I'm on probation but it's now I'm on a violation of probation on a on a aggravated violent charge again. Yeah.

Interstate compact transfer. federal marshals are here extra trying to extradite me in a [ __ ] van back to Idaho as an active duty seal even though I don't have a warrant because so there's all this weird legal stuff going on my girlfriend at the time's an attorney so she's on call with my all these things are happening and I'm like just chaos just my life is falling apart and then I get steroid tested by Navy Jack because they go dude this guy's getting out of this charge again we're not letting this guy he's coming across our desk

Taylor Cavanaugh1:02:33

No. No. They drug tested me and passed. Then they steroid tested me and I lit every [ __ ] thing.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:02:45

Well, I don't know now. Now they're very strict on it. So, I don't want to comment on

Taylor Cavanaugh1:02:49

But now with Hegsets's coming out and giving guys testosterone, they're doing testosterone tests and stuff.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:02:57

Yeah. And I wasn't doing a lot of heavy duty [ __ ] I wasn't like bodybuilding bulky. Like I could still run and stuff like you're in a SEAL teams, you got to be able to run. So, I was doing things for cardio and things and I looked really big and good, but I could still run, you know, and so

So it it wasn't quite like that type of steroid, but I it was my testosterone was elevated. I was in on Winstrol and so I had some other things in me. So, they were like, "Okay, it's zero tolerance. It look they look at it like drugs."

So, they gave me they tried to give me an OTH. I had some good attorneys again. So, now I have an attorney in San Diego. I have an attorney in Idaho on two cases. And I have a [ __ ] military attorney. I'm hemorrhaging cash, dude. Just like Luckily, I was always pretty good with money.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:03:42

Oh, wait. He was civilian.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:03:44

So he's civilian. A former prosecutor for the military.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:03:49

I forget his name.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:03:52

I forget his.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:03:57

I probably should have used that guy. Yeah, you put him in. He would have pretty pretty penny though. But my dude was good and he ended up I I got a general discharge. They took my GI bill if I if I wouldn't uh

Cuz dude they were trying to dig me asking me questions about other seal what's going on this and that. And I said they said hey we'll give you an honorable discharge. You're going to get out still if you say AB and C. And I'm like [ __ ] no way.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:04:19

I was like dude there's absolutely no way. They're like fine. You're going to get an O2.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:04:24

They just wanted information and just wanted to ask what was going on. And I'm going dude I'm already [ __ ] There's no way I'm taking that karmic debt with me.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:04:45

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:04:51

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:19

It's a good lesson.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:21

It's a good lesson to find the art of the line. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:24

And I was in the line. And so anyway, I just I exit stage left and went back to jail in the same [ __ ] county in Idaho because I

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:31

It was another three or four weeks.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:35

Yeah. And so this

Taylor Cavanaugh1:05:42

You know what's weird is I was whenever I've been in jail, I'm like clearing stuff up. So it actually kind of felt good. Okay.

It wasn't like I would have been arrested and I'm facing trial. you know, the first time you get arrested and and you're sitting in county, that's a different thing before arraignment. But I knew I was done and I knew I was going to jail and I walked out and I signed my DD214. I was done. General discharge that which uh the commanding officer Seal Team 7 had the ability to cap it. So, he gave me a [ __ ] general, which was an amazing u gift from him really.

And uh they're like, "This dude, he's done good job for us. He's a [ __ ] knucklehead, but you know, let's let's not he doesn't deserve an other than honorable discharge for And so I thank you know still very appreciative. And then I walked right into real estate development. I had already been prepping. I leveraged a lot of contacts. Dude, we I went in as a assistant supervisor for a the largest private developer in the United States. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:06:38

No, I was I was it's technically like a field manager. So I was running teams of guys from underground trenching all the way up through electrical through framing

Taylor Cavanaugh1:06:49

Yeah. But I So I wasn't touching a tool and I wasn't running numbers. I was doing running inspections running uh coordinating team. Check. Check. Yeah. Project manager. This is exactly what it is. Assistant and it was the largest development in the in the United States at the time. $750 million project.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:07

San Diego Vista called Skyaya. So, I'm driving around here and I'm pretty much a laterali financial move.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:14

So, I'm doing pretty good.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:18

Dude. I was feeling [ __ ] pretty good about life. So, I didn't really And this was like I was in jail Friday, walked out and I had already set up my job for [ __ ] Monday.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:26

And so, it I had no gap. Now, I'm doing aderall and Xanax, smoking weed every day.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:39

Dude. It it [ __ ] is not good. Makes me a crazy person.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:07:51

Dude, I was extreme. And I was getting a lot done. I'm up early and I'm but I'm wired for sound. I'm already a wired individual anyway. And this was And now I'm at the house. I live near the beach. Beautiful girlfriend, truck, like everything's going good again. And but my life is [ __ ] crumbling. I'm in financial massive strain from all the legal trouble. I'm like I'm hemorrhaging. I'm still in the hole like every month. Still making stuff work. My habits aren't great. My relationship is shaky.

I'm explosive. I'm violent with people in my life if they try.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:08:23

I'm still doing steroids. And I'm People are call, you know, anybody tries to push on me on anything, I'm [ __ ] not having none of it.

And so I

Taylor Cavanaugh1:08:35

Yeah. Luckily, I'm good with I'm decent with people. So, I'm emotionally intelligent enough to where I can I understand what certain people need and what they like when I need to push and and when I need to kind of smoo. So, I'm good with that.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:08:50

Yeah. And I'm like, dude, listen, [ __ ] Dude, you guys said you're going to be here with these many guys. [ __ ] do it. Like, I'm okay with that. And so, I was actually very good at it.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:08:58

But that goes on for a year, right? And so now, but my my relationship is crumbling. I'm in the emotional [ __ ] hurt like I've never been, dude. You know that that moment where you just

She takes all the [ __ ] out of the apartment. It's like, you know, that moment.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:09:14

And I'm also having another opportunity with cannabis distribution coming from from former Seals, a Harvard guy, and and and so I'm like having being pulling in different directions. I decide to go with that. Then I go with this venture capitalist, which ends up being a whole another year. But I remember the moment I picked back up the I picked the opiates up. I I remember the moment I was It wasn't for like some people get in a car accident and they're hurt. Not me. I was in emotional hurt.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:09:39

And I knew Percoets always made me feel [ __ ] good. And I called my drug dealer and I said, "Dude,

Can you get me some of those percoets, man? I need like, you know, whatever." And I started doing them a little bit every day. Yeah.

At night. That's right.

While I was doing emails and stuff.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:09:58

That's exactly what I did. And I did them in the bathroom. I would stand up and snort a little bit of Percoet and and do emails and I'd [ __ ] be like work till like 1 in the morning, go to bed and and take

Taylor Cavanaugh1:10:32

And that from that day

I [ __ ] did it every day. I might have missed one day and then fentanyl came in.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:10:39

So I started saying make give me the fentanyl. That's what I prefer cuz it was so much stronger. And so now I'm doing that at night and people are [clears throat] around. Yeah. Cheaper and I had a [ __ ] the h the main hook so I get as many as I wanted

Taylor Cavanaugh1:10:52

Which you know I'm going tits up sometimes. I'm smashing my face. I had to go to a meeting and I'm like going into urgent care, getting stitched up, then going in the meeting and just like nothing happened. Just it was like, oh yeah, I woke up unconscious and and now I got to go to work. It was

Taylor Cavanaugh1:12:05

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:12:07

Yep. And it it picked up, dude. Same way for me. And now I'm doing a little bit sometimes in the middle of the day. But I always kind of had a handle on it and which was the big lie I told myself.

And um you know, and and you couldn't have told me I was addicted, dude. You could not have [ __ ] told me. And I didn't know I was addicted until I removed it. But

Taylor Cavanaugh1:12:27

Until you can't get them. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:12:30

Yeah. I'm going to I'm going to [ __ ] And that's how I felt, dude. And so now I'm I go a whole year doing that. I'm working for a venture capitalist. Now I'm talking to congressmen and changing tax codes and I'm now I'm in a high-rise looking right at Seal Team 7 downtown. gentleman in one of the top floors, a former hedge fund manager who has this beautiful office, 5,000 foot office, all glass, three offices in it. I'm one of them. I'm his like right-hand man.

I get everything [ __ ] done cuz I'm like a super [ __ ] human. I don't sleep and I'm [ __ ] up. And he's like, "How is this kid getting all this stuff done?" I'm also pitching decks for millions. I'm the only one raising capital. He He had a business going and he goes, "Dude, I need to raise a million dollars in a [ __ ] 48 hours. I don't think I could do it." I go, "Let me do I get on the [ __ ] phone and I raised 950 grand in [ __ ] 48 hours.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:13:17

I just had a lot of contacts, man. I had a lot of contacts and I found nine people to write me a check for 100 grand.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:13:23

And and he just cuz I had built up a lot

Taylor Cavanaugh1:13:26

No, this was something completely different. This was buying [ __ ] buying big commercial equipment from it was like he had a lot of different things going on. I come to you know, come to find out things weren't all [ __ ] kosher, you know? You know, and you know what I mean? have a knack of finding these situations.

Things are, you know, it's just interesting how things work. But, you know, now the girl I was with at the time, she she became his attorney and so there was like a lot of I had brought all these people in around me.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:13:52

One guy who, you know, he was Kim Kardashian's former security guard. He ended up passing away recently. One of my best friends. He was had problems with u opiates and stuff. I brought him in. Then I find now the aderall and all this stuff's happening and I'm kind of getting speed wobbles, right? You can't bend reality this. So people kind of see it. I'm missing meetings. I'm, you know, I'm still getting a lot done and they're like

Now the weed business is kicking off and I'm crushing it. And they're like, "Dude, this fuck." They go, "Dude, I know he's like having issues, but he's crushing it." They're like, "I'm not going to [ __ ] say anything cuz he's winning."

Taylor Cavanaugh1:14:25

And and then that was But they're still having meetings about me. And so I'm [ __ ] yelling at people in the office. You guys are [ __ ] I'm bringing you in. And so I'm I'm in this extreme mode with the aderall and all the [ __ ] right? I'm losing my I call it my cheese is slipping off my [ __ ] cracker.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:14:42

Dude, the most sinister and anybody on it, dude. It's like people go, "Oh, I get some [ __ ] done." Yeah. No [ __ ] You get some [ __ ] done at the expense of your [ __ ] sanity.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:15:10

Dude. I was calling, screaming at people on the phone, dude. I felt like a a Wall Street [ __ ] broker, you know, screaming at people on the phone. [ __ ] you know. I'm sure you've been around a lot of those. And dude, it all came crashing down, man. And I literally fell on my face, quite literally. And I was at like off doing a meeting in in Palm Springs and I'm building a facility and I fall down and my girlfriend sees me. There's blood on the floor and I'm like this and I go get stitched up.

But now it's like everybody the gig's up like

And uh I get called in the office and he's like, "Dude, you were my biggest asset." He's like, "Now you're my biggest [ __ ] liability." And that sat with me and I said, "Dude, let me get the [ __ ] out of here." I said, "I get it. Let me clear the office." He goes, "Take a sobatical." He gave me like a paid [ __ ] He goes, "Take a tactical pause." He goes, "We have some business out in on the big island of Hawaii.

Get the [ __ ] out of here." And I said, "All right." I knew there was some other things going on on the personal side, too, that I I didn't But I I was getting marooned. Uh, you know what? What happened? Thank God. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. So, I move all my [ __ ] out there. I go, "All right, I'm going to get out here and wait." You know, now

Taylor Cavanaugh1:16:13

Yep. No, no, I was on Hilo. I I spent a lot of time in Kona.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:16:19

I love the Big Island, man. Well, I had a lot of a religious experience out there, man. I I had like no [ __ ] talk to God. I don't know if I was going crazy or I was losing my mind or I was finding it. But I had three months of for a first week I I moved out there so I didn't have any connections. So I get off.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:16:37

Yeah. I white knuckle it, dude. I'm I'm snorting in the bathroom. I go to Target and buy some food and stuff and I have like a little bit left and I sn pretty much do the rest of it and then I'm like, "All right." And bro, I get an Airbnb. That was uh brutal, man. I I go a week, no sleep, just just really in it, you know,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:16:58

Yeah. And and I say you you think you're in you're in paradise, but man, I was in hell. And I was trying I was

Taylor Cavanaugh1:17:06

Dude. You'd think, but you know how it is. It's just like, you know, you're asking and and I actually had this weird experience. I was like, "Dude, I need some weed. I need anything." Cuz I had nothing.

Yeah. I'm still doing aderall and Xanax and [ __ ] but it that stuff I didn't even really think I really had that much of a problem with. And I cut that later, no problem. But

I see this homeless kid and I pull over and I go, "Hey man, do you have any weed?" He goes, "No, dude. I have these dabs, you know, with like these things." And so I'm like, "Fine, dude. Whatever. I need anything." He goes, "Can you give me a ride?" And I said, "Yeah, I'll give you a ride." He goes, "It's kind of far." I said, "It's fine." He goes, "And so I drive up there and it's like kind of getting in the evening and he's telling me the story of like his life and how he ended up behind a dumpster and he goes like, "Man, I need to." He goes, "You want some acid?" And I go, "Yeah." I go, "Fine." And I go, "Fine." But it ended up being one of the most amazing experiences.

I'm talking to him, but I'm having like these and I'm just coming out of this like getting off of the and so I'm having these like realizations and I drive and I drive him down valley like all the way down this thing. I'm in a four-wheel drive car and I'm It's pitch.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:18:12

Oh, yeah. I'm driving up there. [ __ ] I'm driving up there and I'm feeling good, but that stuff doesn't really touch me. I metabolize uh psychedelics psychedelics pretty easily. I have a I've done a lot of psychedelics growing up and so I wasn't I wasn't new to it. Oh,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:18:26

Yeah. Yeah. So, I'm familiar with it. And so, it was actually very minor, but I'm just having like some realizations about my life and what I want to do, man. and uh and and this new beginning, you know, from from lack of a better word. And I drop him off and I and I'm standing out there and it's like pitch black, man. And it's where they hid King Kamehameha when he was growing up, that same little valley.

And I just go, man, life's about to change, man. I go, this is the calm before the storm. I could feel it.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:18:53

Way?

No, he's gone. I dropped him off at this like this uh you know with those little roots they farm out there. I forget what it's called. And uh until I drive back home and I knew these things are going to be different and um I I you know I had a a hard couple weeks and I run out of money and now I'm homeless and [ __ ] living in my car and suicidal island.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:19:14

You know I get cut off and now things are carting and now I'm [ __ ] marooned. Right. And I get cut off after a few months but I had you know sold my shares in the company. I had done a couple things. So I but I had bad habits still and so I'm not working and and are

You training? Are you working out? So I'm going to the gym every day and so you always dude I did I worked out. It's like go I'd go to the gym every day. So that's why I I had I could keep this lie going. I'm like dude I still look better than 90% of people even though I'm a [ __ ] opiate addict, you know. And and

Taylor Cavanaugh1:19:43

Yeah. And so I I come to this point. It's September 11th and I get the email last and I go, you know, you're done and I'm I'm out of money, dude. And I'm like, I need to go. I drop a buddy off at the airport who was with me [gasps] and I go, I got to go think. I had $6 a month.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:19:59

I'm driving a I'm I shipped out my truck. So, I had like a Nissan Frontier. I shipped out my truck.

So, I go and I go I need to think. I need to sit for a minute. Like, I have no I wish I had no money. I'm in like negative in my account. My credit's [ __ ] And um and I So, I go sit. I have no gas in my car. I was like, I need to figure something out. And I had never really burned in like that, right? I had always had things working. And And so, this was the first time. And I get there and I go and I turn my car off, man.

And I had this like whole world come crashing down. I realized I I'd lost everything now. I had I had no title, no money, no nothing. Now I'm not I have I got nowhere to go. I'm [ __ ] homeless in my car.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:20:39

And I was two years ago, uh, you know, a Navy SEAL or whatever. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:20:45

One year ago, And one year ago, I'm in a high-rise, you know, crushing it. And, uh, you know, beautiful spot downtown. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:20:54

No. And so I got DMT in my car, but I still do an Adderall and Xanax and stuff, but I'm drinking every day, but I'm I I had moved the the percoetses and stuff. I'd removed that. Wait a minute. You have [ __ ] DMT?

Yeah. So that I had got from some local girl who farmed it.

[ __ ] does DMT as a recreational and I it was it was not something that I like but I'm just saying I had it in the car. I had done a little bit, but it's not like it's mostly weed mixed with some other stuff, but that wasn't really my thing. And I go, "Holy [ __ ] dude. What am I going to do?" And I go, "The phone's going to ring." Always rings for me. You know, the 11th hour, radio silence. I wait another day.

Radio silence. Another day. So now I'm in this car for 3 days, man. Now I'm starting to smell like a homeless guy. And I'm going for these walks

And I'm looking over the cliff, dude. And I'm thinking about killing myself. I'm like, "Dude, it's not high enough. I'm pretty hearty. Like, I'll just get banged up on the rocks." And I have a sawoff shotgun in my car. How the [ __ ] did you get

I procured it somewhere in Hawaii in one of my states of psychosis, right? It's, you know, burning around on at

Taylor Cavanaugh1:21:56

Yeah, I got unregistered saw off in my car.

And uh and I'm sitting there looking at it. I'm like, dude, I'm [ __ ] tired, bro. I was like, I'm just done trying all this stuff, dude. Like trying to achieve and fail and self-sabotage in this roller coaster. And I was really contemplating it, man. And I walked around and I just finally had that voice of clarity going, "Hey dude, sack up." You know, call it God or the universe. Like, think of your mom. Think of your sister. You know, what kind of damage are you going to leave for them if you're going to go down and it's your [ __ ] fault.

It's like I finally started hearing that like, bro, all this stuff, boohoo, this person, that person. I'm like, bro, the truth is you open the door to all this and it's your fault. [snorts] And I went, all right, that's it. I go, I'm going to [ __ ] sack up. And I had already kind of a few months earlier thought the Foreign Legion, if things didn't come to fruition that I would pull it. And I go, dude, I'm going to the French Foreign Legion. [ __ ] this.

I was like, if I'm going to die, I'm going to do it with my boots on and I'm going to do it with some honor. And I'm like, I'm like, if I would just end it now, then everything here's bonus. I know it's going to suck. I know it's going to be hard, but let's rock and roll. And dude, I called too fat. I called my mom first

And I just said, dude, mom, I'm uh I'm okay. I'm like, I'm definitely at rock bottom. I said, if this is rock bottom, being in Hawaii, my car is probably not the worst rock bottom ever, but I'm definitely bottomed out, but I'm okay and here's my plan. And she's like, okay, sweetie. Like, she knows I'm [ __ ] you know, crazy, but she knows when I say a plan, I generally do it.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:23:27

And so, I called two fast cash loan places, man, and they would give me 500 bucks for 4 million% interest, you know, and uh and I took it took $1,000 and I bought a one-way ticket to France. Wait, what happened with the loans?

Taylor Cavanaugh1:23:41

No, I paid them. No, I paid them. When I got out of the foreign legion, I ended up paying probably four grand or something, you know. So, I I paid, you know, uh about at least that. So, when I got out of the foreign legion, I had been saving money and I had other things. And so, my I had built a financial plan. So, right when I got out, I paid it.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:24:07

Oh, I had a bunch of [ __ ] points from American Airlines. I actually took a first class flight, dude. I took a first class flight. So, I was I was eating like a champion, dude. I was homeless in my car. I drop my car off and I go to the airport pretty much. And then I get drop it off at somebody's house. I said, "Just take it. I'll come back in a few years for it maybe." I didn't give a [ __ ] dude. I paid off, you know?

So I was like, so I took a first class flight from Hilo or Kona actually. Kona to Paris,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:24:35

No, I stopped in LA. Okay. I stopped in LA and then um and yeah, so I was living high on the hog and then I check back in and I got no money. So now I'm going

From that first class flight to host where I'm living in like a bunk cuz I needed to get all the drugs out of my system. You can't be on aderall or they're going to drug test you. You're going to the military.

So I go, "Okay, I'm going to flush my system. I've taken enough drug tests where I know I need like three solid days of running. So, I started I started training that last week before I went. I'm running around the track. I'm like cuz the French Foreign Legion is a running unit. Is the biggest running military unit in the world.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:25:14

That's your weakest joke on.

Yeah. And so I I went and flushed my system for three days in downtown Paris staying in different host and eating. And I'm like smoking cigarettes standing on the corner just like okay well this is about to do it and I finally get everything going and I take my little train and go knock on that door man and it's a interesting process.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:25:35

It's a big It looks like a medieval gate. It's a old stone building almost in like a neighborhood on the outsides of of Paris.

And it's a big iron and wood gate and you go knock on it. And I went in there on on uh the hunter full moon in October. It's like raining. It's night time. It's Sunday night. And I went in. Dude,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:25:58

I had done some research. I wanted it to be quiet. I wanted it to be low impact. I didn't want a lot of [ __ ] people around. I knew Sunday night would be

Someone a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. You can go knock on that door on Christmas Day.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:26:12

It's a very interesting sense. For 200 years, it's been like that.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:26:15

So, it's a weird unique and you go carry a bag. People that aren't aware, it's a old the French foreign a 200-y old institution that is was created by an old king to get people out of foreigners out of his bars and causing problems and back onto the battlefield for France in the with the carrot of French citizenship.

Okay. Built it's modeled after the old Roman legions.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:26:39

Bag of a black black duffel bag and my passport. And I gave him that passport and I didn't see that passport again for 3 years, man.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:26:47

Yeah. They take it.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:26:51

No, I knew I would get it back. I mean, I had like uh you know, I knew you could get in and then you could get your passport back after a couple two or three years. You route additional paperwork. They give you your real name and your passport back because before that you operate on a fake name with a French passport with a fake name on it. Mine was Mine was Trent Clayson. They use your same initials. And he was born in New York City, September 11th, 1985.

That's what they had me as.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:27:18

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:27:24

He said, "Take your [ __ ] hat off." He said, "Unlevton Chapo," which means take your hat off. And it's French.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:27:29

I just had a hat on. I wasn't thinking, you know? He said, "Take your [ __ ] hat off." Then he said, "Go sit."

Taylor Cavanaugh1:27:36

I know. I had a baseball cap on like yours. Just like that. But he said, "Take your [ __ ] hat off and uh and then go sit." And I waited, dude. And I'm in this like castle and there's like dirt crumbling on my head. And and then I get p taken by a corporal chef, which is like an E6 something kind of equivalent who's from Ukraine who took me in the back and he walks me back and the first thing I did, they get up on the [ __ ] pull-up bar and they crank out pull you crank out your pull-ups.

How many do you have to do? You know, it's pretty it's kind of you want to be able to do like 10 dead hangs, you know, but you want to be able to crank some [ __ ] out because he might be like, but really I think it's six or something.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:28:17

Dude. People take from go from some village in South America will take a boat to a train to a bus to a plane to and they get all the way there and they [ __ ] fail the pull-ups.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:28:33

Hey, dude. Get up on the pull-up bar. If you can't do pull-ups, go do it. People avoid them. And it's like such a confidence building exercise.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:28:40

The core of all fitness,

Bro. If you if you can't I I think the dip, the squat, the run, right? If you could just do those and the pull-up, you have a good you have a push-ups, you have a pretty good handle of your fitness if you can move your body up over a bar like

100%.

Yeah. So, that I just cranked a bunch out. That wasn't an issue.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:29:03

Yeah, I could do a lot of pull-ups. And so then uh IQ test, really basic one. And then just to make sure you're not a [ __ ] [ __ ] It's a really easy one. And then they search your bag and then you're waiting, man. And they put me in this barracks. A bunch a couple just in that room. There's a couple kids from Mongolia, Thailand, Lithuania, Ukraine, Malddova, and uh a couple kids from Nepal, and me in this.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:29:35

There's kids in there that are about the business that have seen some [ __ ] And then there's some kids in there who are like, "Holy [ __ ] where am I at?" You got the full spectrum.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:29:52

It's different. It's a different entity. It's a different reality. And so it's a lot of kids that are there cuz they have to be.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:30:00

So it's there's that. Then you have guys there who are there's like three types. There's the machine of war called machine dare which is like the [ __ ] dude from some Russian goolog who just wants to get after it with a belt fed. There's that guy.

Then you got the romantic who's like I lost my girlfriend and now I go to the war and those guys get [ __ ] crushed. Then you get the pragmatic guy who wants it for the money and the passport.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:30:22

So you get those three. I'm like kind of a mix of one and three probably. Okay. You know, I was like,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:30:34

Those guys want the passport. Dude, there's a there's a kid from Kenya. Dude, we'll talk about the running, dude. Humbling running with this kid. So he people that aren't aware, getting a visa to France from Kenya is [ __ ] hard. Yep.

And so any African nation. And so how did he get there? He goes, "Dude, he he could not get a visa." He goes, "Well, marathon running." He's like, "I could [ __ ] run." Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:01

They're running a minute FASTER EVERY SINGLE MILE

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:14

But, um, dude, he was humbling cuz we there was a test. There's a run test in the foreign legion. It's I think it's 2700 m. Oh, no. It's 12 minutes. And I think 2,700 meters is how fast you got to run at the basic.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:35

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:37

Yeah. 12 minutes. So it's like fast.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:41

It's not crazy, but it's like that's the base. I think he was running [ __ ] like 4,000 or something. Dead serious. Don't quote me on that, but it might have been in the fours, dude. 4500 if I even remember. It's something crazy. And I remember being so humbled by like him passing me.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:32:59

How far you could get?

Taylor Cavanaugh1:33:11

Yeah, dude. He was up there like it was significant.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:33:17

He's tall, very lean,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:33:24

Yeah. So, he was he was tall and lean and uh his brother was a legionnaire, too, who had also run and done this something similar.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:33:33

He can do pull-ups. Like, he wasn't super strong, but they I mean they built them up over time cuz we did a lot of rucking, man. And and so the process is when you go in, one of the biggest things they have is is the interrogations, dude. They call them the Gustapo interviews because it's you do some physical stuff and then they you do another IQ test and then medical, dental, they check your teeth, your feet, your your the way you stand. They kick guys out just cuz they [ __ ] didn't like the way their legs were shaped.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:33:56

So, one out of 15 guys who knock on the gate actually go to boot camp. One out of 15. They kick everybody else out. Yeah. They're very Because the France doesn't want to pay for people's medical [ __ ] problems.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:34:06

So, they're looking at teeth and all these different things. And then when I got in,

They call it the Gustapo interviews. It's they pull up everything they can on your background, Interpol background checks, your own country's checks. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:34:20

Dude, they're like, "What?" Well, they asked they're like, "What the [ __ ] is a Navy SEAL doing here? Why are you here?" Yeah. And I told them, "Dude, I ruined my whole [ __ ] life, man. I need a like thing." And and I told them some truths, but you know, some, you know, I wasn't telling them the whole everything, but I told them pretty much what was up. And and my story checked out. They're like, "Obviously, cuz they don't want problems with

The United States government, war crimes, and and things like that. Sexual crime, anything like that, they don't want a [ __ ] problem with."

So, my story, I'm like, "Dude, I'm a [ __ ] knucklehead and I [ __ ] up some shit." And it actually checks out. And you're telling them this in English.

Tell them this in English.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:04

Do you have some guys? I mean, it's trial by fire. Some guys there speak French. Guys from Tahiti. You have a couple guys from France. You have some

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:12

Well, they're French.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:14

Dude, they don't have a So, they're French and Yeah. They'll go. There's a lot of Tahesians, some Fijians. You got 150 nations represented.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:23

Yeah. So, only things you don't have. Only countries you don't really have are like North Korea and Cuba. I think they're the only ones. I'm dead serious that they don't allow. Everybody else is pretty much cleared hot. I have

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:34

Yeah, that might be different now, but that was kind of how it was. And I never met a Cuban. I

Taylor Cavanaugh1:35:40

Yeah, dude. There was some funny stories of a guy from Romania walked to France and like hitchhiked and [ __ ] Walked no passport and so he shows up and they're like and they go the [ __ ] guy figured out a way to get here from [ __ ] Romania. They're like let him in. So they kept him.

So during the interrogation what's happening? So they're like you're a [ __ ] liar. You know I had

Taylor Cavanaugh1:36:04

I tried to. I didn't say knucklehead but they're they're they really were like why is a special operator here? What's the [ __ ] issue? Do you really know what you're getting yourself into? It's going to be, you know, and

Taylor Cavanaugh1:36:20

They were like, they were more like, "Dude, you're going to be cleaning [ __ ] toilets again." Like, back down at the bottom. You know what I mean? Like, you're going back to basic boot camp in the infantry. Yeah.

Are you going to be able to do that?

Taylor Cavanaugh1:36:32

Yeah. They told me that at the end after they said they were going to give me a contract. They're like, "Dude, you're gonna have some [ __ ] corporal here who can't [ __ ] shoot telling you you're doing some [ __ ] wrong on the gun. Like, how are you going to deal with that?" I said, "I'm going to be fine, dude." I said, "I don't have a [ __ ] choice. I got I ch I shut up my credit cards and threw them in the trash before I got here.

I had no way to get home. Zero. I have to be here. So, let me just kind of see." I said, "I can tow the line." And I did, dude. And I I clean toilets. They'd be like, "Navy SEAL, come clean this toilet." And I'd be scooping piss up after [ __ ] they they'd wake me up in the middle of the night, some toilet flooded, dude. I did that for years, bro.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:37:05

Years. Couple years of of like bottom of the barrel [ __ ]

Taylor Cavanaugh1:37:15

They don't care, you know? And so the first and it's just paying your dues, like cleaning and doing all this [ __ ]

But there was no like, well, this guy's already du later, but you're there for 5 years, right? So, I'm there half a decade. So, it's So, I get there and and I'm all now I'm dealing with all the emotional piece, too. Dude, I got I'm in this [ __ ] barracks room. I'm low. I'm [ __ ] shark on the bottom of the ocean. I lost everything. Nobody even knows I'm here except my mom and like my sister. And uh I'm off the grid, you know, what did I do with my life?

And so, I'm having now I'm having quiet, sober quiet that I had never had and uh in years. And so I'm had a lot of time to self-develop and reflect. And I'm sitting in this barracks room going, "Well, what can I control?" And over those years, and mind you, I deployed the first year to South America doing deep jungle operations, blowing up gold mines and [ __ ]

Taylor Cavanaugh1:38:15

Illegal gold mining in French Gan. A lot of people don't know Gon France is French territory. Yeah. Down in France.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:38:21

Bro. It's a wild west. It's an old penal colony.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:38:30

Great great movie. But that's that's the real deal down there, man. That is Amazon jungle. And they had us in a small Ford operating base or outpost on the Cerninon border. So it was eight it was a a you know obviously flying there, then a boat to a bus to a [ __ ] 10-hour pureog ride down in the jungle, man. And then

See those skinny little river boats that we get hi up by the natives and load our gear up on and go up the Amazon River. Dude,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:39:02

The guns were bad. So out there we're using the FAMAS which is that kind of weird shaped French rifle if you've ever seen it. It's like an old bullpup people that are aware. It's a odd looking rifle but pretty damn good and pretty simple and useful in the jungle. But they also had the HK416. So super [ __ ] nice rifle that they the front. So the gear was good.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:39:28

It was it was all good. It was all new. It was all decent. It all worked well. Okay.

Like it was we're still the redheaded stepchild of the of the French military.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:39:41

So I was getting infantry gear. So it was simple.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:39:46

Yeah. army boot camp stuff. But I'll tell you, I like the simplicity because it was like I didn't have to get on a [ __ ] radio. Like I I I was just put a rock on, shut the [ __ ] up, and just go. And there was there was something pure about it that I needed to like heal. I

Taylor Cavanaugh1:40:07

No gunfight, no gunfights, no firefights, no

Just like go blow this up, you do it, and you leave. There's no confrontation." We had dicey situations where we had people with guns on target like and and but nobody's shooting, not like firefights.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:40:28

When we would do close quarters combat training and things like that, they saw moving through the house that I knew what the [ __ ] was going on. And they would have me show guys what was going on.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:40:39

So when we got to Estonia, so Ukraine kicked off. So Ukraine,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:40:47

Dude. I just got back two two years ago, man. I just I got back in uh January 2024.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:40:58

Yeah, Russia Ukraine gets off. And a lot of people don't know Ukraine is 10% of the Foreign Legion. 10%.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:07

Yeah. So what happened was they go, "Okay, a lot of the Ukrainians deserted to go fight, right?" They left and uh

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:18

Yeah. So some guys left to come back and grab their family and France allowed foreign legionnaires to grab some of the Ukrainian family, which was cool. So that was that they granted, you know, visas or whatever.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:33

Yeah. Some guys left and didn't come back. Some guys left and got family and came back.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:40

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:44

Not let them. But they just do what the f the foreign legion is a weird animal. It's like you're not French.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:51

Throw you in jail. How? You're not there.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:56

Yeah. They're [ __ ] gone. They're not.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:41:59

Just leave.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:42:00

Yeah, you could do whatever the [ __ ] you I mean, you're off on the weekends and stuff like you're you're locked down on base, but dudes go out. I had a Bulgarian girlfriend in in Marseilles for 4 years, man. It's like in on the beach. So, you you're living a normal lifeish,

But you're living on base and very it's very strict when you're on. I mean, they'll put you in jail for put walking across the grass wrong. It's very and you're breaking big rocks into small rocks when you're there. So, it's a very like thumb on, shut the [ __ ] up. You got a lot of Eastern block guys. The culture is like prison with a gun. It felt like jail. That's what it that's the it's like cold like that. And um

Taylor Cavanaugh1:42:36

The dress uniforms are fire, man. They look, you know, the white cap and the white keppies kind of got an interesting history to it because the old Algerian, you know, uh conquest in the 1800s, which is the where the foreign legion got their like name.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:42:51

They they used to be a tan hat, but they were in the desert for so long it would turn white. And so now the French foreign legion has a white cap and it's a kind of a cool thing. the the uniforms are very you spend a lot of time working on the uniforms, but your day-to-day you're in you're in like forest kind of camouflage, you know, that like Vietnam kind of looking camouflage with the with the green beret is your normal kind of flow.

And when it kicked off, they they sent us to what's called the enhanced Ford presence battle group on the Russian border in in Estonia. So they've just to kind of flex on the border and we linked up with UK, Estonia, and the Danish.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:43:34

So we went with another French military contingent and we're the French Foreign Legion. They're like, [ __ ] dude. French foreign see a lot of dudes with face tattoos and [ __ ] you know, there's no tattoo regulations. Obviously, I got a lot of my, you know, my stuff there while I was in like head. And so it's very unique in that capacity. the French military loves us because the [ __ ] French Polynesian doesn't complain. they'll live they'll we'll sleep on the ground like there's no we don't have a lot of fluff or comfort and so it's just the culture and we were working with all the tank battalions and it was funny because I'd be doing like exercises out on the border of with uh the some of the tank units in the UK and the guys will be like hey and they see the French flag and they're like uh we uh you know trying and I go dude you speak speak

English to me man and he's like what the [ __ ] are you doing out here dude [ __ ]

What the [ __ ] dude they're like bro get over here like, you know, have a cigarette, sit on the and so I'd sit there, they're like, "How the [ __ ] are you out here with a French flag on?" And I'm like, "Dude, I don't know, man. It's it's

Taylor Cavanaugh1:44:34

Yeah. You know, I didn't telegraph that a lot, but people found out later. And um you know, I didn't really talk about that stuff much. It felt like a different life.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:44:48

Identify guys." So, there's a bar in there's a big drinking culture in France, right? I mean, they unload the wine with the water, you know, anywhere you go. Really? Oh, dude. It's like And so, beer and wine

Are [ __ ] And there's a bar in every combat company. And we lived when in my combat company out of a hund of 90 guys, 60 spoke Russian.

60. Wow. So, just to put It was a very rusafhone heavy culture.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:45:15

Yeah. I'd speak speak my Russian's not great but I can kind of understand them and you know dora and like speaking in the morning and stuff and so we'd speak French and Russian kind of all day and um but you know you'd have the guys drinking and they'd come in your [ __ ] room. Oh, where's the American? And they'd be a drunk and they'd [ __ ] come bang on your door, open your door up at like [ __ ] 2 in the morning, dude.

And I'd be wrestling with dudes in the [ __ ] like fighting dudes. That went on for a couple years until it stops. You feel me? Yeah,

You start getting ranked and then and then you start getting a little, you know, dicing some people up and not that I'm the toughest guy in the world. You know, I've been I've had my ass kicked before, but not much.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:45:56

Yeah. They go, "Where's the American?" And they know that, you know, they're drinking. And so it's a that part was terrible because,

Dude, I was 34, 35 at the time. I'm not no spring chicken. I And I had just I was sick of the games and I wanted to [ __ ] sleep. And I was really I would get up at 3:30 in the morning because I really started to hone in my disciplines and like it the only thing I had control over was like my morning and being ahead of the game.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:46:20

And cuz it like the morning process is something I I promote and preach to people all the time. It saved my life, man, of like

And I know you you're a guy of discipline. It's just there's so much out of my control in this in the foreign legion that I was like I need to have control over what I have control over. training in the morning, my food, like how I started to think and just

Move. And so that stuff would disrupt it. And so that was just [ __ ] annoying. And

Taylor Cavanaugh1:46:47

Yeah. It just And and you you had no safe. There's nowhere to hide.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:46:50

There's nowhere to go, man. You live in this building and it's like,

Taylor Cavanaugh1:46:59

You No, we didn't have our own room. So it was three to a room.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:47:05

Some privacy. Yeah. You have your own like little like sinks and stuff and like you you you could put a little fridge in there and like when you start getting a little rank and I and then I could and then I'm eating like my canned tuna and I have my protein powders and like I I started to build my system to where and then I had my gym on the weekend out in Marseilles that I would go train and I was focused man. Like after the first year when I got my bearings [ __ ] really started to rewire and and adjust and build my blueprint.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:48:53

Dude. That's most people that subject to decision fatigue and then living I I read a statistic that said 85% of people are caught in the guilt shame loop.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:49:04

You know, map of consciousness, people where guilt and shame are at the bottom, which we've, you know, people who have been addicted to things and made a lot of mistakes. I know I have lived in bro. Guilt, shame, then you do something to make yourself feel a little bit better in the moment and then you you aren't proud of yourself and it's like you're you're in this low vibrational state. It's very hard to build a beautiful life in guilt and shame.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:49:25

Once you get up, even anger is better than guilt and shame. Apathy, anger, at least you're moving up the chain. But then you get to this acceptance and this love and this enlightenment which we're trying to go towards. That's where I was trying to go, man. And dude, let's talk about the running for a minute in the form. Brother,

I showed up and dude, it is minimum five miles a day. So, it's five miles a five days a week pretty much every [ __ ] day. Raining, snowing, ice, doesn't [ __ ] matter. I'm in the m I'm in the mountain regiment. So, we are way up there where it's like Arctic tundra.

And I'm I'm, you know, I'm in the French Alps training in the summer and in the winter building igloos.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:50:02

Dude. Beautiful hard as [ __ ] And I'm with guys from Nepal who are [ __ ] smoking cigarettes going up the because there's a lot of guys in Nepal in the foreign region. And dude, I'm And now also no food in the morning. So, they don't eat anything. They just eat black coffee and like a piece of bread maybe.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:50:19

But nothing formal. That's only if you want to. But you don't go to a galley or nothing. It's not even available.

But dude, they call it petite footing. Little running, dude. 13, 14, 15 miles. Not unheard of on just a [ __ ] any random day,

Dude. Any random day. The French officers, everybody goes out. Dude, we were doing full half marathons, full marathons in boots, in mountains, no [ __ ] training, no anything, no food, nothing. No water, nothing. Just

Taylor Cavanaugh1:50:45

Nothing, dude. Dude, no water stations, no nothing.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:50:48

No, dude. They [ __ ] go, dude. It's just built in. They're like 13 miles ain't [ __ ] They're like, that's a [ __ ] short run. And so that's that's the quantity of running. It's just a different philosophical approach than the United States military. And dude, it was like God smiling at me, bro. Because I would be getting yelled at by some Russian dude with a f in French, you know? He's like some some dude yelling at me in a Russian accent in French.

Hurry the [ __ ] up. You know, some of these dudes are machines of war, man. They can run and do I'm this I hadn't run in years and first year was hard. Then it got a little bit better. Now I'm running. It still was never great. And uh but dude, every day just showing up and it was just having to click into that gear of like I don't care what's going on around me. I'm not [ __ ] stopping. I'm not quitting.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:51:41

Eight miles.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:51:44

Dude. Yeah, we were deep Amazon, man. We were we were way deep in Amazon. Right on the Brazilian Cerninon border, dude.

Running [ __ ] running eight miles, dude. Just because through the mud and [ __ ] they they were they would it didn't stop anywhere. The for

Taylor Cavanaugh1:52:00

Almost every day.

Well, dude, if you're like, "Yo, we got an operation later today. We would run five. We They wouldn't maybe do an eight, but they'd do a four or five mile and then [ __ ] you'd ruck up and go. We would do

Taylor Cavanaugh1:52:17

Dude, we would do 100 kilometers in like 14 days [ __ ] rocking with a chainsaw and with chainsaws and and [ __ ] in the back, dude. Chainsaws, hammocks, chainsaws, hammocks, all this. And they would be like, "Hey, Navy SEAL, let's give him a the sledgehammer, you know?

Taylor Cavanaugh1:52:38

With assuming a mosquito net. You'd wrap you'd zip it. Yep. You know what's surprising? The the mosquitoes are pretty bad, but I didn't notice that as much. You the ants is something you don't think about. You cannot set [ __ ] anything on the ground. So they teach you they put us into this like 5day crash course of Amazon survival when we get there. And they go, "All right, well here's what you And they have these jungle experts and they go, "Watch out for this. Watch out for that.

Here's how you set up your hammock. Here's how you tie the knots. Here how you do all this stuff. Your gun." There was these special hammocks that you slide your gun in right next to you.

Here's how you set your boots on sticks and all this [ __ ] dude. And then [ __ ] All right. Now, and it was water purification tablets and Amazon water. That's what that's how we did it. You cuz you can't carry enough water, dude. We would drink I would carry three liters and I'm like I'm like a so it's heavy and I was dude I would drink it and I would all of them all day and never piss. Just never just soaked from head to toe.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:53:43

Yeah. I mean you know you'd piss sometimes but it was

Water purification tablets and rain water. So it was amazing when it would rain because we'd collect it from our tents and stuff and that [ __ ] tasted great cuz you know you're drinking brown Amazon water. But dude, I had never got the sniffles. I felt [ __ ] probably the best I ever felt in my life down there. It was pretty amazing, you know, just eating MREs and stuff. And so I had some good buddies from Madagascar and South Korea and [ __ ] really interesting moments down there.

And it was, dude, small cities. Small cities. We'd come across grandmas carrying [ __ ] [ __ ] with with sandals [snorts] and these huge Some of these places had [ __ ] one place had a karaoke [ __ ] bar in the middle of this gold mine, dude. It was We'd burn it all down and move on to the next one. We hit them every day.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:54:29

Burning down to break all the equipment and then keep them moving.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:54:34

Dude. It's like wild west out there. And then there's legal gold mining, too. So, we'd come across the legal ones and dude, these places would be I don't know how they get these machines in there. They would get it in there and and assemble it in while they're in there and it it uh you know, four or five guys will be pulling out €750,000 a week.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:55:00

We'd look, man. I never I never got nothing. But, you know, they they keep a pretty I think they I don't know how they or if they did or or maybe the French officers got it. I never saw it. You know, we'd see like gold chunks and dude, we'd come across these little islands and stuff because there is places that are like lakes and small islands and we went to this one island. They had a big gold mine on it.

Dude, you pick up the the sand, just gold flakes just all in every piece of sand.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:56:23

Dude no thanks dude we got hit me and my buddy from Madagascar he's a he's a Muay Thai champion And so 39 1/2 is the cutoff.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:56:30

And he showed up at the door. 39 and a half like exact. And he had been fighting Muay Thai in Thailand. And so interesting guy. But he's walking with me and we run into these bushes and we get hit with these called these they call them fireflies in the Amazon. Dude, it's like [ __ ] Game of Thrones down there or like hunger. Well, that's why I was bringing up cuz I think if I'm in the Amazon, like I've talked to people who've done those adventure races like I did in Mongolia and I did another one in Africa and they were like, "Dude, we did one in [ __ ] I don't know, Panama or something in the jungle." He goes, "The worst experience of my life." Like, I don't mind the running, the suffering, the eating, the food.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:57:08

I hate sleeping in a tent.

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:57:14

Dude. I sleep like a baby. I love the jungle. That's it's one of my favorite places I've ever operated. I thrive. I as a little kid, I was always fascinated with Vietnam, but even in the jungle there, it was um

I love that terrain. I love slow, methodical, wet. Like I th I really thrive in this.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:57:36

I dude with a machete and hacking the whole way. And I I um I sleep like a baby in a hammock and they have these howler monkeys all night. It's like [groaning] sounds They call it linen ferv. That's what the French call the jungle which means green hell.

It means green. It sounds like green hell. We saw big jaguar prints dude that size of my hand in the I never saw a jaguar.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:58:07

The croc they the caymans are small. They're like three. So they're not really going to smash you. There's bigger ones that I think are 6 feet that are black caymans. I think that we never

Taylor Cavanaugh1:58:16

It's usually just got to watch for the rain and kind of what's going on and where the rivers are going, but we'd wash our clothes in there. But some stuff you don't think about is,

You know, you're washing your shirts and stuff and and it's that that filth that silt and it's sand and so you're walking and you're sweating and it's [ __ ] rubbing and so you just like it feels like sandpaper all over you after days and days.

But you get good at it and I really thrived in that. I really liked the environment. is probably one of the most unique places I've ever been in my life.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:58:47

100%. I [ __ ] don't like mountains personally. I spent a lot of time in the Alps. We train. We do stuff. I'm just It's not my forte. I live I kind of live in northern Idaho now and they're pretty much prefer the jungle.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:02

Yeah. Yeah. I much prefer that deep deep humidity. Like I got off the I got off the airport here. I love man that like it feels like God's giving me a hug dude when I feel that humidity.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:19

I would have loved that, man. Dude, I love feeling like I can barely breathe, dude. I like

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:32

Think about the longevity as a runner.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:41

Wow.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:43

Wow.

Taylor Cavanaugh1:59:48

Yeah. It's like a super fast,

Taylor Cavanaugh2:00:11

Oh, really? Oh. Oh, interesting.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:00:21

You do. So, so you a lot of times, most of the time you're running in running shoes, okay, in the foreign legion, at least for training in the morning. And then when you do a lot of the longer runs, they they're like hoo-ya runs. Like Christmas is huge in the foreign legion and the there's all these competitions and a lot of them are running based. You're running in boots for most of those.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:00:40

Yeah. So, like the mountain obviously you're running in the mountains and [ __ ] you know, you're going to kind of want a boot and they do that as kind of like a tip of the cap to military kind of. I got

But most of the training you're running in running shoes and they're actually really good because I was never really super jenned up on good running shoes. When we got in there, I had you bring your own running shoes and [ __ ] They're like, you have to buy these if you're going to be running a lot. And it was like Hokas or something. I had never really [ __ ] with that. And I'm like, I don't need them. They're like, you're going to want to [ __ ] buy these.

It was a beautiful decision, which I still stand by. Great company, but I don't know what you run it.

But that was a savior for me for for like running long distances was having good running shoes.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:01:38

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:01:40

We didn't run in running shoes, man. It's like what? We never trained like that. We only ran in boots. All All SEAL training is in boots.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:01:49

Yeah. So, we never ran in any and you're running wet a lot of times. And so I don't think one time we ran in running shoes.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:02:02

So I actually was in my last Twilight Tour, right? I come back. I'm not I had screened for a group called GCM, Group Commando Montan. I actually failed one of their running tests. It's a very it's I got invited to go. It's their commando unit, kind of a higher level type unit. and I failed it. And I'm like, "All right, well, we'll see." And the guys are like, "Come back and [ __ ] try it again. It's a lot of good dudes." And I'm like, "Well, we'll see what's going on." I go on deployment to Estonia.

And I come back and now I'm on this like kind of Twilight tour. And I go, "What am I going to do, man? Maybe I screen again. Maybe I do." They're offering me like a different job and kind of some some cool things after promotion or sergeant and different things. And I'm like, "Dude, I kind of want to tell my story, man." You know, I I felt like this need to, Dude, I'm like, I'm having great days in the Foreign Legion. [ __ ] Dude, they used to call me Msure Sole, like Mr.

Sunshine, just cuz I'd be smiling and it's a [ __ ] hard place to be positive. Very hard place. It's a very hard place to be positive. They yelled scream in the morning and I just was [ __ ] like untouchable, man. I felt so good about who I was and what I did every day and training and

I was like I I was suicidal in my car and now I'm having great days every day. I couldn't even remember the last time I had a bad day. Yeah,

They're [ __ ] serious, man. I had bad moments, but really good days.

I'm like, I want to tell my story, but I'm like, dude, I haven't had social media ever, you know, and I never for years. And the SEAL team, I just didn't have it. I'm like, well, maybe I'll start. And I got hurt. So, I tore my medial calf muscle and I get sent to a French hospital. They're looking at it, but I really had heard it three years before and I just kept running on it. And so, I'm in the mountains and it kind of was like I could feel I didn't have a lot of juice on it, but it was deformed.

So it was like the whole [ __ ] medial was torn. But I had just kept running on it. It didn't stop.

But I'm like, it's time to get this checked out. And so I go to this French hospital and they're like, what the [ __ ] is going on? Like we can't even tell. Like it's super in like So they kept me there for 6 weeks and

Taylor Cavanaugh2:03:58

Dude. They sent in specialists. They sent in all these MRI. They're taking me all these things and they're like, "Dude, we don't know how you're walking." And it's like [ __ ] up. Like we we don't know what's going on.

So they kept me in this thing. So I'm sitting in there. So now I have like my first time ever where I'm like don't have anything to do. They're sending me to physical therapy every day and doing all these things, but you know, I don't have anything to do. So I'm like, well, maybe I'll start posting some pictures. That's it. You know, of like kind of my path and just some quotes. And dude, I had been just studying so much of self-development stuff and proverbs and samurai philosophers and stoic philosophy and just the B so much stuff.

And I just felt like this need to get it out. So I started book posted some quotes and started connecting with people that I hadn't been talked to in a long time and that felt cool and I finally felt like this kind of connection again with the world.

Yeah. And um dude and I I going through and and I keep rolling through and I'm training and I'm posting some stuff and it's picking up some pace and then I I tell my story on YouTube and I'm in my French Foreign Legion barracks room in my uniform and I send my and I just talk about being a SEAL and then the French Foreign Legion and I [ __ ] it hit hard my first [ __ ] post. Hundreds of thousands of views on a long form content and I post another one.

And so what was the video? What did the video consist of? just I do everything and I still do it. I've been I did one this morning. I do stream of consciousness, seven to eight minute talk just of lessons learned, wisdom, stories, all these things. No stops, no edits, no no anything. Just [ __ ] put the camera down, press play, and I've done that two times a week for three years now.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:05:36

And so that was my first one, and it got 100,000 views.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:05:40

The path from being a Navy SEAL to being in the French Warren Legion.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:06:01

Okay

But they don't like it when it gets [ __ ] booms right you know guys will you know and I'm not saying anything bad about foreign legion at all and I never

Taylor Cavanaugh2:06:10

Well that's why they that's what they're worried about

Taylor Cavanaugh2:06:21

No, now that now it doesn't matter. But I would never still just because I have I have a respect for the institution. Okay. You know, I would never and there's like there's sure there's negative stuff, but I I I respect

Taylor Cavanaugh2:06:30

Yeah, I had a good experience and I and I and it was positive for me.

But so I'm I'm like by chance I'm away and I'm with a buddy who's a SEAL who just happens to be in France and he's like, "Hey dude, let's go to this winery." And so I and I had to go to a doctor's appointment. So I'm like away from the regiment and I get a [ __ ] call and it's pretty much they're like NCIS for

Taylor Cavanaugh2:06:54

Oh yeah. They go, "Hey, unl when you get back from your [ __ ] vacation, take all the [ __ ] down off of your social media and this and that." Mind you, I'm already coaching and I'm doing stuff now, right? You have clients,

Dude. I'm making $40,000 a month sitting in a [ __ ] barracks room coaching.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:07:15

So I'm not [ __ ] taking this [ __ ] down, right? And so I uh

Taylor Cavanaugh2:07:21

They're like, "Hey man, so I get on Zoom. I'll do one-on-one Zooms. I'm like I take a look at their diet, their schedule, and what the [ __ ] they're doing every day. And then I hone in and I sharpen all that shit." And that's what I do.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:07:33

So uh I'll look at their macros, their micros, their training, and then also just how they're thinking and what they're doing. And that and and then just sharpen it up. And so I'm already coaching, doing stuff, and actually having a lot of success from his barracks room. And so I'm going, dude, this is what I'm planning on doing. I'm And because I set that first video, and this is the real deeper.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:07:56

I've been doing it for years from that point, too. And it hasn't stopped, right? And so I,

Dude, I've done about 1.5 million in about two and a half years, right? Off just coaching, off just coaching one-on-one. And I [ __ ] show up every day and I just keep doing it. And I've did it from that barracks room. And so when they called me, mind you, I'm already getting hundreds of emails from guys who are going, "Dude, I was in my car about ready to kill myself. I'm a former veteran and I really [ __ ] dude, I saw your video and I'm getting the chills." Not one or two, hundreds of emails like this.

And I'm going, "Dude, I'm not [ __ ] taking this [ __ ] down for anybody. I have a higher calling with this." And they said, "Fucking, you're taking it down or we're going to put you in jail backto backto back 30-day [ __ ] jail sentences until we kick you out anyway." or you [ __ ] don't. And I'm like, "Okay, well, I'm getting a [ __ ] lawyer." So, I got a French lawyer. I like I'm not going back to the base because they're going to [ __ ] crush me.

So, here's what really made the decision. That Monday, I was I had a vacation day. They didn't know that because but I had already been approved. So, I had a because I had to go to the doctor's appointment. They went in and trashed my [ __ ] room. Locked everything up. Locked everything I owned up with zip ties and all the [ __ ] And I get a call from my South Korean buddy. He goes, "Dude, they trashed your [ __ ] room. They came in and and uh he goes, "Dude, you come back here, you're [ __ ] slammed." They didn't tell me that, right?

So, I knew this information. I go, "Dude, I ain't going back there." Right? So, I called a a lawyer and and so we worked and I'm fighting them and they and I'm in contact with them and I'm going, "Dude, paperwork, it's all kind of covered." They're like, "Hey, you know, I'm still on this medical kind of weird leave thing and so there's like some gap." And I'm fighting it and this finally this lawyer comes to the end of thing. He goes, "Dude, you're not a citizen.

You're never [ __ ] signed paper. You're not anything here." He goes, "Dude, they can do whatever the [ __ ] they want to you. Do you even know what you signed when you?" And I said, "Fuck no." It was all in French. He goes, "Yeah, dude. They He goes, "Get the [ __ ] out of here." You're not He goes, "Dude, you're" He goes, "They're going to kick you out anyway. You're not taking this down. You pretty much told the general to [ __ ] off.

It's not going to go well." And I knew that already. So

Taylor Cavanaugh2:10:03

Yeah. because it wasn't an issue, but I was getting hundreds of thousands, half a million views on everything I was putting up. And I was all positive stuff here, be better, you know, [ __ ] don't make, you know, but they didn't like the

What I could say, right? And I never would though, but they don't know that. And I understand their side. So I said, "Fuck them. I'm getting the [ __ ] out of here, man." And so I called them. I said, "Hey, I'm out of here and break my contract." And they said, "Fine. You [ __ ] do your thing and do your thing." And I left. I took a one-way ticket.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:10:31

So I I'm not allowed back in France. That's the whole thing.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:10:34

I can't touch. Technically, I can't go on any French territory.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:10:45

I had nothing, dude. Oh, but here's by chance. By chance, when I leave that um So, it ended up being good cuz I got I was I was where I needed to get. There was no more missions. I wasn't resigning. I was like six months away from my [ __ ] So for me it was like

Taylor Cavanaugh2:11:00

And people will say that puts an asterisk on it like oh you [ __ ] did and I go look and I say look

Taylor Cavanaugh2:11:08

I go it's not my country I don't have loyalty to France and

Sure it's I would like things to go well I go but dude this ain't a [ __ ] fairy tale it's life man [ __ ] happens businesses business agreements break marriages break dudes will be calling me off of you broke your oath. I go, "Dude, you're [ __ ] divorced. You cheat on your wife. Shut the [ __ ] up, dude." It's like these things. I go, "Dude, I got to do what's right for me and mine." And I felt like I was on a higher purpose.

And it's And you can only tell a smart decision in retrospect.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:11:38

I have a house. I've made [ __ ] million dollars. I've uh had helped thousands of people, thousands of clients. I have a baby. Like all that stuff. My parents are, my mother's proud of me. My family's good. I've had some unbelievable vacations and cool moments. I've got to help my mother who had some recent health issues. None of that would have been [ __ ] possible,

Taylor Cavanaugh2:12:11

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:12:33

Dude, I am so grateful. Sure, there's the risk. There's no safety net, but there's also all the upside. And I love having for so many years, man, I had no full agency of my life.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:12:44

Having full agency of my life. And here's the key, right? People go, "Well, how do you [ __ ] keep it going?" Dude, I still to this day do the same thing in my beautiful master bathroom in my modern farmhouse that I did in the French Foreign Legion barracks room. Ask my my my fiance, "Dude, I wake up at 4. I do push-ups in my [ __ ] bathroom on the floor with my black coffee every [ __ ] day." I did them in this hotel room today.

I and I record it every day. I record it and I and I because it's part of what I do. That's my like homage to God or it's like my respect of of I heard this quote that said don't take too much in this world. Taking too much for me is would be getting too comfortable being like dude I don't really have to get up early. I don't have to go train. I don't have You're right. I don't have to. I could get away with not doing it but I'm [ __ ] scared.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:14:50

It's holding the line and it's like that line if I start moving it

Degradates very quickly. Exactly. And and so I have a little fear and it's a healthy fear, right? I don't like to live in a fear might but I have a healthy fear because dude I want to pay my respects every day getting up early even on vacation man like not that I'm a robot. It's not always 4 on the dot. It might be 4:30 but it ain't seven right ever for me. That's just how my thing that I like to do.

And it's proved to work because then that how that sets me up also is dude seven days sometimes seven but always six days a week dude I do one-on-one Zooms eight nine hours a day. I start at six I go to 10. I break, work out with the kids, spend some time with the girls, and then I do it in every [ __ ] day for years since the day I got. And so, and I've kept that going, and it's proved to work. [gasps]

And so, looking back, man, I'm just here's what I'm proud of. I'm proud of the discipline I learned there of the self-discipline and then maintaining it and keeping all the pieces and with all the whack-a-ole stuff. you got kids and dogs and so you know it's like all that stuff and still maintaining some some semblance of like battle rhythm and discipline and and and constantly holding the line. That's what I'm proud of, man. And and I try to lead by example and show some other people some things that have worked for me and and some outside perspective and reframing and and [ __ ] having that good positive lens.

Not a fake [ __ ] cheerleader, but just a positive grounded optimism that I find is I wish more people could touch on, but it's on the other side of [ __ ] heart. Like, which is I love the [ __ ] name of that because you cannot get around the universal homage [snorts] required to be paid to experience that euphoric feeling. And it's on the other side of [ __ ] hard. I love that like that title resonates with me so well, man, of your book because there's no way around it.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:16:56

Yeah. It would have no meaning.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:17:59

I'm surviving."

Taylor Cavanaugh2:18:12

Best way to get a hold of me is tayloravana.com. Right? That contact form goes right to me. I don't outsource. I don't AI. I I do this by design because I want to see people coming in my pipeline and see exactly what the [ __ ] going on.

And I hit people up personally, you know, so I I and just so they know it's me and it's not some [ __ ] And so taylor cabavana.com once again it has different thing you know things you can select if you just want a hour consultation or you want formal programming it's got different things you can look at my Instagram tcap official which I'm on there and I do a lot of daily posts and workouts similar to you you know just words of wisdom while you're working out and and lifestyle stuff and keep it fun and I'll post some of my morning workout and and mindful stuff and my YouTube Taylor Kavanagh TCAP TV where it's where I dive into kind of some deeper principles.

I actually just did story 300 today. It was 300th time I set it down man from that foreign legion barracks room was the 300th episode today by by in a I did it the title on the power of repetition. Title the power of reps right which is people overestimate intensity and underestimate consistency.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:19:21

And that's like a piece of my life. It's like when you go running when you do this yeah you push yourself but

To the point where you can do it again tomorrow. Yeah. Like that's the key. People go do CrossFit or try these different things and they go [ __ ] crush themselves for 6 months and then they're laid up for a [ __ ] year because they burn out. I go, "What's the point? I want something that I can do till I'm 80." Yeah.

That's what that's the type of plans I like to build for people and it's

Veterans, executives, business owners, doctors, lawyers, former operators all over the world. I got guys in UK, a lot of Australian clients, guys in Africa, all over the place, man. And I just love people who want to get better. [gasps] take some honest self-inventory and let's break it down. And so let's start extrapolating it and and looking at it with a with a magnifying glass and see where we can tighten up in smart ways and a sustainable ways. And I'm not a dude that is like shove a square peg into a round hole like you got to get up and [ __ ] forward.

Not everyone's like that.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:20:15

You know, I'm not I'm not not everybody's schedule's the same. Not everyone's food's the same. And I adjust it and tailor things to make it make sense for people. I have guys from 70 years old to 18.

So it has to be different. And and people have different goals.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:21:41

I got guys who are oil rig workers, SWAT officers, guy and they're working swing shifts and [ __ ] 4 in the morning and working. Yeah. What I at its most boiled down way I can explain it is intentionality.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:21:54

Let's do things intentionally and with some strategic purpose to it and and that that's goes into the discipline. Let's build something where it's not just [ __ ] shoving whatever in your mouth and doing this like and but it has to make sense for travel for guys that are doing different times and swing shifts and family. It all has to make sense. If it doesn't it's [ __ ] pointless. So the best program in the world is one you'll [ __ ] do. If you dude, you could have the most rock solid program.

If you don't do it, it don't mean [ __ ] man. And so that's why I go, let's find what we can do. I got guys that are injured, dude. I've had I've worked with clients who are in paraplegics.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:22:30

Yeah, man. Dude, I I've I've done YouTubes with one of my clients who uh broke his neck, young kid, you know, and so getting into the gym, what can he do? I [ __ ] fascinated. So, dude, he fixed his food, started tracking his macros, started doing some things that he can do.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:22:52

So, there's so many ways. It's Let's control the controls. Let's do what we can do. And you can't do more than you [ __ ] can do.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:23:10

No, man. I think we covered a pretty good pretty good swath. I think it's been amazing being able to serve with two countries and then I did it the opposite way. You know, go special forces to infantry. That taught me a lot. I'd say the SEAL SEALs taught me a lot about, you know, tactical proficiency and and some it gave me some confidence and the French foreign legion taught me patience and perseverance. I would say patience would be a big one.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:23:52

Yeah. What have you done?

Taylor Cavanaugh2:23:55

Yeah. What did you do?

Taylor Cavanaugh2:24:01

Yeah.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:24:13

Yeah. Yeah. I'm I'm appreciative of you, Ken. I really respect your story, man, and just reading what I have and looking forward to reading your book and and getting some synergy on something in the future, man. Whether you're down in San Diego or you're in Idaho, man, we'll get something together and I'd love to get you on a YouTube session to where we can get you in the gym, just start talking, man. Maybe you even get me out there running, bro.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:25:07

You don't want to be the dad with tits, dude.

Taylor Cavanaugh2:25:20

Thank you, bro.